Warner Todd Huston: Another illiterate conservative who gets paid to write

You know, I probably could do this job by searching for grown-up men who simply must call themselves by three names. Another post, another day.

Anyway, I found this ‘Warner Todd Huston’ when I came across his “Can We Talk of Liberal Hypocrisy?” post on Red State. And, as usual, when a guy gets into that rigid, William-F.-Buckley-as-a-Victorian posture, fun will abound.

It’s astounding that so many of these puffed-up statues can be found online, totally clueless, making their livings by practicing their chosen incompetence: writing.

Can We Talk of Liberal Hypocrisy?< May 8, 2009 | Warner Todd Huston --Two examples that reveals the unprincipled left for what it is.--

It is often useful to review the past to see how it affects the present and with the rise of The One, we can see revealed the basic hypocrisy…

Wait, roll that back…BWAH HA. That’s a new one. Establishing your illiteracy bona fides before we read the article. Congratulations, wingnut, that’s some sort of record.

Two examples that reveals the unprincipled left for what it is.

And those two examples is…what? Tell me, Warner Todd, because I needs to know. Don’t leave mes hanging.

It is often useful to review the past to see how it affects the present and with the rise of The One, we can see revealed the basic hypocrisy of the left that is so blatant as to be nearly unbelievable. Well, unbelievable if anyone were to mistakenly imagine that liberals and leftists actually have any principles, that is.

Your usage of the subjunctive pretty much obviates ‘mistakenly’, doesn’t it? Let’s pretend I’m here to help. And then you pile on an ‘actually’ as well? It’s as if you were mistakenly unable to actually write.

The hypocritical shift that attitudes on the left took between George W. Bush’s days in office and that of Barack “I won” Obama is stark, but revealing.

Stark is revealing. That’s how it got to be ‘stark.’ You don’t think much about this stuff, do you, W.T.?

Let us start with the left’s unhinged reaction to the Tea Party movement.

Unprincipled showmen like Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow pretended not to understand the protests and immediately turned any actual discussion of policy differences into some lowborn sex joke.

Well, now this is just sucky. The ‘unhinged’ reaction to the Tea Party was ‘laughter’. And would a principled showman be Glenn ‘Tears For Fears’ Beck? Or Sean ‘Spicy Mustard?!’ Hannity? But, okay, it was a ‘lowborn sex joke’, fine. Or a ‘born-low and landing-lower sex practice’. Or, a ‘lowering sex parts into someone’s willing gob’ political prank on the oblivious who cheered it repeatedly. By name. That one’s your own fault, incidentally.

Look, Warner Captain BatGuano Todd Huston, if that really is your name, your post is a complete trainwreck. Whatever you were trying to say, it’s dead on arrival.

And–speaking of ‘hypocrisy’–how can you call yourself a ‘professional writer’? You couldn’t get a bolded subject and verb to agree before the introductory paragraph. Oh yeah, that’s right, like a lot of other right-wing bloggers, you’re a ‘professional writer’ because that’s what you put on your 1040 forms. No matter how gnarly your syntax gets, some wealthy wingnut pays you to continue to do…whatever this is.

Meanwhile, I get paid dick. It’s a shame someone won’t bankroll me to punk a red-ass like you up and down the internet, it’s pretty easy.

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