Hopeless stupidity of Conservatives 2: ACORN staff ‘homicidal prostitute’ punks Fox, headlines Bill O’Reilly, Sean Hannity and Glenn Beck

This one almost defies description–it is just awesome in its brazen stupidity, shocking obliviousness to real life and naked lust to equate the community organizing group ACORN to the ethnic Satan-dong-smooching baby-pinchers Conservatives are sure they really are.

Internet douche and domestic-terrorist apologist Andrew Breitbart (previously hammered, here) has made himself a 'Til death, which will be soon.legend this week by running video ‘sting operations’ on ACORN staffers, getting them to say stupid things, tolerant of perhaps criminal activities, that get the group into hot water.

The gambit: two extremely white people come in and pretend to be a pimp and prostitute. Why the ACORN folks ever fell for this pathetic crap, we’ll never know, but the actors pretend to need help, and by-the-way they know of some underage El Salvador kidnapped sex slaves. Hey–isn’t that cool? So goes the sophisticated ‘sting’ script.

It’s had some success in getting staffers to play along a little too ‘live-and-let-live’ for even ACORN executives to be comfortable with: firings have followed, funding has been whacked.

But now, Breitbart, doing the same schtick and with Fox in tow, just hit the Conservative Media JACKPOT. An ACORN staffer professes to have been a hooker!! And to have murdered her husband!! And she says…‘good for you, you, and all your new sex slaves b-movie cracker pimp and prostitute!!’

DEAR ME. This certainly brings up a number of questions, doesn’t it? Like, how ever did the largest name in cable television news so easily fall for it? Why wouldn’t they even begin to vet a lurid story from a dubious internet douche like Breitbart? Why are Conservatives utterly immune to real comedy?

Turns out not all ACORN staffers are dumb, this one smelled a rat from the beginning. Playing along with these weirdos in her office, not knowing how bottomlessly stupid Conservatives are, she made the headlines of all of megacorporation Fox News’ biggest hitters.

When the actors approached Ms. Kaelke with their provocative costuming and outlandish scenario, she could not take them seriously. So she met their outrageousness with her own personal style of outrageousness. She matched their false scenario with her own false scenarios.

“They were not believable”, said Ms. Kaelke of the two actors. “Somewhat entertaining, but they weren’t even good actors. I didn’t know what to make of them. They were clearly playing with me. I decided to shock them as much as they were shocking me. Like Stephen Colbert does – saying the most outrageous things with a straightface.” While her sense of humor might not be funny to many people, the fact is that she spun false scenario afterfalse scenario and the videographer ate them up.

For example, in response to the set-up by the filmmakers in which they say they are trying get the young woman away from her abusive pimp, she responds that she was abused by her former husband as well (true) and that she shot and killed him (false). He is very much alive and living near Barstow, CA.

Don’t take Tresa’s, or anybody else’s, word for it: the San Bernardino Police got involved after the airing of the video and the predictable explosion of gullible outrage by right-wingers. How the hell did this depraved ACORNer get away with shooting and killing her husband?

ACORN provided a copy of a San Bernardino police report of their investigation into the “homicide” of Kaelke’s husband. The police concluded, “the claims do not appear to be factual. Investigators have been in contact with the involved party’s known former husbands, who are alive and well.”

And if Fox had a quark of journalistic ethics, they would have found out the depraved ACORN master criminal was, at the very least, telling whoppers to their hidden camera.

But why bother when you’ve got the goods, as far as Fox cares? And, my God, did the big hitters know that they had the MONSTER scoop of the year, or what? You can practically feel the heat coming off their adrenalized brains as they’re figuring just when patriotic vigilantes will begin assassinating depraved community organizers, and then Obama will have to resign. Here:

Neither side is riffing particularly well, there, really. Tresa spends a great deal of time trying to come up with the appropriately stupid and outrageous thing to say in many instances, but, hey, it still worked. One side is swallowing the whole thing hook, line and sinker:

‘So it’s basically–she set up the murder of her husband.’

‘Did you ever check to see if in fact she had a husband that was killed?’

‘We’ve–we’re working on that.’

OOPS. Well, you can stay tuned for all tomorrow’s apologies and retractions, on Fox.

Wanna swallow that?

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