Glenn Beck’s Painful Honesty: Both sides “absolutely shock and sicken”

I suppose it’s understandable that average (or normal) people see Glenn Beck as a partisan conservative assclown.  Its not hard to see why his frequent embarrassing missteps cause some to regard Beck as unserious — an unstable, bitter, dry drunk inexplicably rewarded to play conductor on massive mental trainwrecks as a type of performance art.  Sort of like Howard Beale .. only for retards.

But there’s another “reality” — that of his emotionally damaged fans.  They believe (because he’s told them) that he’s not a partisan, or even particularly political at all.  They say his focus is really on standing up for what’s right, and if liberals and Democrats didn’t hate God, morality and America so much, he wouldn’t go after them about it.  Still (they say) he’s tough — but fair. He thinks for himself, and if he sees someone on the right lowering themselves to Obamunist standards, he doesn’t try to sugarcoat anything.  He’s willing to confront an ugly truth most Americans are afraid to face — sometimes, both sides do it!

Need proof?  In his 2007 #1 NY Times Bestseller An Inconvenient Book — Real Solutions to the Worlds Biggest Problems, Beck demonstrates his non-partisan, call ’em like he sees ’em, approach . Beck “organizes” his book in short spurts of his trademark thinking, and the fairness shows up at the 9th Chapter’s second spurt — Party Before Principles.

I’m going to quote a large part of it (pp:121-123) so there are no questions about context:

Attack of the Attack Ads

During the 2006 campaign season, the attack ads were flying from both sides of the aisle, and some of them became unbelievably personal. Remember, a campaign is essentially a long interview process; it should focus on your ability to do the job, not unrelated (and often untrue) personal issues.

In the 13th district of North Carolina, Republican Vernon Robinson was running for Congress against the Democratic incumbent, Brad Miller. Here are a few actual lines from a television ad financed by Robinson’s campaign.

“Brad Miller even spent your tax dollars to pay teenage girls to watch pornographic movies with probes connected to their genitalia”

“Brad Miller spent your money to study the masturbation habits of old men”

And this, from a radio ad (with mariachi music playing in the background): “If Miller had his way, America would be nothing but one big fiesta for illegal aliens and homosexuals.”

Think about the message these ads are really trying to send. If you reelect Brad Miller, this country will turn into a nonstop homosexual, pedophile, illegal alien, and teenage girl party. Would those groups of people even want to party together? I think it might be awkward.

This race devolved even further than the “masturbation habits of old men.” Robinson actually put out a campaign flyer that seemed to suggest that Miller himself might be a homosexual, since he’s middle-aged and childless (he’d been married for 24 years). Pretty bad, right? Well, I bet Robinson must have felt like quite the idiot when Miller’s wife was then forced to respond: “It wasn’t God’s will. I had a disease known as endometriosis. I had a hysterectomy when I was single, at 27. I met Brad after that.”


The fact that a candidate’s wife had to answer questions about her ability to have children should absolutely shock and sicken you. Unfortunately, it probably doesn’t — and that’s a microcosm of everything that’s wrong with politics.

Mr. Robinson, incidentally, was not elected.

Not to be outdone by those ads, Democrat Michael Arcuri and Republican Ray Meier, running for New York’s 24th Congressional District, upped the ante ever more. An anti-Arcuri campaign ad featured the silhouette of a stripper next to video of Arcuri. The narrator ominously said, “The phone number to and adult fantasy hotline appeared on Michael Arcuri’s New York City hotel room bill … while he was there on official business … Who calls a fantasy hotline and then bills taxpayers? Michael Arcuri.”

“Bad call!” the stripper adds in a sultry voice.

There’s only one problem: Arcuri had already proven that the phone-sex allegation wasn’t true. His coworker had used his hotel room phone and inadvertently dialed a 1-800 prefix instead of a 212 prefix when trying to reach the state’s Department of Criminal Justice Services. It was just a coincidence that the rest of the digits were exactly the same. According to phone records that Arcuri produced, the first call lasted just moments and was immediately followed by the second call.

Does the truth even matter anymore? (That’s a rhetorical question.)

To his credit, Arcuri’s opponent said the ad, which was created by the National Republican Congressional Committee, was “way over the line.” Incidentally, both candidates say they are friends. As I said before, it all sure seems like one big game.

To sum up, in the first case, a Republican made vicious, outrageous and dishonest attacks on his Democratic opponent. In the second case, a Democrat was the victim of vicious, outrageous and dishonest attacks against him by Republicans. The ‘Both Sides Do It’ gambit in practice.

What does Glenn Beck see that others don’t?  Just this: that his devoted followers are dumber than fucking earthworms .. and he doesn’t seem to mind rubbing their noses in it.

It’s self-evident that his disciples are not the most perceptive, but I think this is strong evidence that Beck may actually be a sociopath, secretly and passively ridiculing his own fans.

Beck must enjoy making fools of the buffoons dumb enough to listen to his rants and buy his crap merchandise. He quotes The Daily Show‘s Jon Stewart on the back of his book — “Finally! a guy who says what people who aren’t thinking, are thinking” — obviously delighted with the attention, and now he’s found his literary niche. He’s what people who can’t read are reading.