Brent Bo$ell: I hate the T\/ @iring b*d w%rds

brent_bozellThere’s Brent!

There, clickers, is one delicate flower. There tumults the soul who can’t abide bad words. He can’t go on pointedly and publicly because bleeped-out or asterisked media might be worse. Wh0 d0 you th!nk yo\/’r$ f00Lin6, L|8eral%?? I know what you’re trying to do. You’re trying to hide cursing, doody-heads.

Friday, May 28, 2010
CBS: the Toilet Network
by Brent Bozell

…CBS has ended the debate over accidents. The artists formerly known as the classy “Tiffany Network” have very deliberately introduced a new show called “$#*! My Dad Says.”

That’s right — the fecal curse word starting with an S in the title. They pronounce it “Bleep My Dad Says.” They could simply have called it “Stuff My Dad Says” and not lost a scintilla of descriptive power. All they would lose is the childish wish to offend.

shit 1

This S-bomb show is a spinoff from a page on the social-media website Twitter with the same toilet-plugging name.

shit 2

Perhaps someone would argue that CBS is merely trying to stay true to the spirit of the actual Twitter page by Justin Halpern, where nearly every 140-character tweet of his dad’s cranky “wisdom” is laced with profanities. Halpern already milked his cursing dad for a book deal before turning his excretory ambitions to television executives.

shit 3

Critics outside the Hollywood bubble scorned CBS for its gaudy attempt to take profanity to a new level, to which CBS responds that the show will “in no way be indecent and will adhere to all CBS standards.” What is clear is that there is no such thing as “CBS standards.” There is only that which CBS can and can’t get away with.

shit 4

The whole S-word debut was unveiled on the same day that CBS submitted a legal brief in a federal appeals court declaring once again that it cannot be fined for the Janet Jackson breast exposure. In a defense that would make Bill Clinton proud, CBS argued it did not have a “guilty mind” in airing the wardrobe malfunction.

shit 5

Doesn’t the one hand of CBS really betray the other hand, as much as they try to play ignorant?

shit 6

Our broadcast television networks are not being shy about their agenda. They clearly intend to drag the American people into the enlightenment of the “21st century,” where all that is putrid is permissible.

shit 7

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One thought Brent Bo$ell: I hate the T\/ @iring b*d w%rds

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