Hey, when you’ve got what appears to be a winning issue, your job is to flog it, right? Beat it to death beating your opponents, that’s the game. Well, maybe not you — maybe right-wing nutjobs. Right now, it’s their job to tie a big winner, illegal immigration, to the front bumpers of anything that passes by.
For instance, you say the economy’s bad? Illegal immigrants steal good jobs from desperate Americans.
Blah blah blah blah healthcare? BLAH BLAH BLAH ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS!
Ooooh, this is fun — DeRoy Murdock wants to play! Let’s watch . .
Bullets across the Border
When El Paso City Hall is being struck by bullets, why is Obama targeting Arizona’s immigration legislation?
► DEROY MURDOCK
Niiiice, good opening. I had no idea illegal immigrants had opened fire upon the El Paso City Hall. Though, I must say, this breaking news sounds oddly distraction-less for the thumbless magicians over at the National Review Online. It’s still interesting. I’m in — what the hell is up with El Paso?
The U.S media have snored, as if under sombreros, right through the events in El Paso on June 29. At about 4:50 p.m., city workers were performing their duties at El Paso City Hall. Suddenly, a bullet pierced a window and traversed an interior wall before it was stopped by a picture frame. Another bullet smacked an exterior wall but did not penetrate it; the bullet was recovered and proved to be from an AK-47. In total, seven bullets hit El Paso City Hall that day.
AK-47! WOW — illegals strafing one of our city halls with AKs! Pissed off criminal brown types blowing holes in our government edifices. Holy smokes! Yee haw, this is some good shit. YA GOTTA TELL ME MORE . .
Police say these bullets most likely came from across the Rio Grande, echoing Pancho Villa’s cross-border gunfire in the same area in 1919.
Linkie! Hot damn:
“The City Hall of El Paso, Texas came under automatic weapons fire from Juarez, Mexico earlier this week, in an incident eerily reminiscent of sniper fire from Juarez into El Paso in 1919. In that incident, Pancho Villa’s snipers fired into El Paso after defeating Mexican federal forces in Juarez . .”
So, snipers shooting at the — wait, what? You’re telling me that Juarez Mexicanos were sniping at the El Paso City Hall? I’m confused — what do building assassins have to do with our illegal immigrants?
At the same time that El Paso City Hall came under fire, six Mexican federales were battling a gun-wielding gang outside a Smart Supermarket on Bernardo Norzagaray Boulevard in Juárez, Mexico, about half a mile away. Chihuahua State Police say they found 40 spent shells from an AK-47 and other weapons at that spot. Mexican Federal Police officer Domingo Hernández Espinoza was killed in the confrontation, and two other people were wounded, one fatally. Amid all the crossfire, bullets ignored the border (a common regional attitude) and struck the seat of El Paso’s municipal government.
. . . hahaHAHAHA — a shootout in Juarez, you say? Gangsters gunfighting it out with the federales — their bullets flew into El Paso, hitting the city hall? Goddamn it. Every other country in the world, bullets always stop at the border — but Mexico? Noooooooo. You know they’re doing this on purpose. Well, we should gouge out the eyes of all their illegal immigrants. That’ll teach the Mexicans and their snotty, liberal gangsters.
If only that bastard Obama hadn’t gagged Governor Jan Brewer with Arizona’s S.B 1070 and then raped her, none of this would have happened. A President who was serious about illegal immigration would’ve sent a couple hundred thousand soldiers into Juarez and shot up the town up by now. A really determined President would’ve stopped the bullets at the border with better detection and enforcement. A Republican President would’ve constructed a series of titanium U-shaped tubes embedded in a 15,000 foot high rubber fence to redirect those dirty, thirsty bullets trying to seek a better life. Now there’s an immigration policy Texans could hoot and holler about. Once they’re done, y’know, hootin’ n’ hollerin’ about somebody stompin’ on a bug. Or a funny-lookin’ penny, or a person’s head. Yeeeeehhhhooooooooooooo. Yeah, after President Romney sells Texas back to Juarez to fund the boojillion-dollar Goodyear National Yooie Enforcement Perimeter.
That reminds me — you know what’s even more shocking, Juarez-violence wise? When an El Paso Border Patrol agent shoots a 15 year old kid — standing in Juarez about, oh, 30 paces away — in the head, killing him instantly. Throwing rocks ferchrissake — ! It’s a miracle the agent escaped without a single bruise.
So, what — now they’re mistakenly shooting at us with AKs? Time to flatten this dogshit town with a nuclear strike. At some point, we’ve got to take illegal immigration seriously.