The case for regulating Ayn Rand’s corpse humpers

Glibertarian Republicans go after the FDA again.

“Do we believe that McDonald’s and Kentucky Fried Chicken and Safeway and Kraft Food and any brand name that you think of, that these people aren’t concerned about food safety?” [Rep. Jack] Kingston said on the House floor. “The food supply in America is very safe because the private sector self-polices, because they have the highest motivation. They don’t want to be sued, they don’t want to go broke. They want their customers to be healthy and happy.”

Of course. Jack’s hit the nail on the head — who wouldn’t want others to be healthy and happy? Nobody. That’s why nothing ever goes wrong. People don’t want bad things to happen. So they don’t.

Union Carbide cared for its Indian neighbors. That’s why they didn’t spill a massive cloud of cyanide across Bhopal, killing 3,787 of them. Why would that proud subdivision of Texas’ Dow Chemical do such a thing? They wouldn’t. Those guys are all about happy and healthy. They don’t want to get sued. They wouldn’t want to go broke. That’s why they didn’t do it. The private sector polices itself, hooray. The children can return to kindergarten now, sorry for the delays.

How about that farm in Germany?

THE bean sprouts contaminated with a particularly nasty strain of Escherichia coli, a bug that normally lives quietly in the gut of humans and other animals, have now sickened over 3,250 people in Germany and caused 37 deaths. Since the outbreak began in May, a quarter of those infected have developed haemolytic uraemic syndrome (HUS)—a potentially fatal complication that affects the blood, kidneys and nervous system . .

Many of the patients with HUS will need kidney transplants or require dialysis for the rest of their lives.

They’d need dialysis IF the farm weren’t from the private sector. But because it’s a profit-driven entity, nobody shat any blood. Or died. Whoopee. Idiots police themselves.

Speaking of which — who wants to break laws? Who would choose to go to jail? Nobody. That’s why we don’t have police. Or lawyers. Or prisons. Hooray.