Awesome conservative website, typical teenager

When you need someone to come down on the affirmative side of the “Scott Walker: Yay? or Yaaaaaaaaay!” discussion, perhaps it’s time to try a younger writer. After all, teens are years away from the seduction of Satan alcohol, and look what it’s done to John Boehner. However, they’re vexed with demon acne, and that’s no picnic (look what it’s done). On another other hand, being a Renew America teen means plenty of happy picnics with your friends: Political analysts and propagandists. Here:

Conservative hope for new year
Jordan Debbink | Renew America | Dec 26 2011

It was 1 year ago that last November that the voice of the common Wisconsin Conservative said “No Thank you!” to the possible election of the Mayor of Milwaukee to our State Capitol and instead hired the same Cities County Executive with 52% of the vote. After months of Big Government form Washington, the state that swayed Blue, went Red in acknowledgement that mistakes were made in the 2008 Presidential Election.

2 sentences, 21 words capitalized, 14 of them wrong. So many Capitols, so few buildings. All those Colors. No thank You.

As the hours became days and the days became months, Wisconsin Re-Opened for business! And as the state earlier went from Blue to Red, so agan it changed colors. Only this time it went from Red to Black, in response to a new and bold leadership…

…by way a vicious strain of politics called ‘Walker Gangrene.’ It’s got the Republicans from the neck up. Jordan is aganst the Recall, incidentally.

Because for every dollar given to enhance education into a more liberal bias, for every signature signed on that petition, for every truly shameful and unethical tactic used, there is a voice so vexed that is sounds of a thousand strong.

When I ger drunk my voice sounds sovexed, too. And is sounds of a thousand strong, hic. Renew America considers itself a top-drawer website, believe it or not. When About.com listed it as a right-wing destination, RA crowed:

Currently, About.com — which is owned by the New York Times Company — lists RenewAmerica among the “Top 10 conservative web sites” in the United States.

And they spelled every word correctly. Alan Keyes’ grass-roots editorial philosophy typically shuns the strictures of punctuation and capitalization, preferring everybody hit their keyboards with the wild abandon conservatives are known for. Who needs rules? Not these hippies.

Thanks additionally to the Haylofters for giving Jordan leave of his holiday duties: shimming the rickety leg on the manger.

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4 thoughts Awesome conservative website, typical teenager

  1. avatar Aileen says:

    Acne and typos? Really? Wish I could get back the 60 seconds I spent reading this junk.

  2. avatar toma says:

    Ger back, ger back to whete you once belonged. Blang, blung.

  3. I am the one who wrote the article you have here. what you have was a rough draft. I’m thankful for your time spent to call me out on my grammar and spelling, and i assume since you didn’t have anything to say about my facts that you agree with me. if your willing i can send you the revised copy which is now published.? thanks for your time.
    humbly serving, jordan Debbink

  4. avatar toma says:

    Hello Jordan. I thought you might show up.

    Yeah, I poked some fun at you. But I’m not about to send serious criticism your way because of your age. If you re-read the piece, you’ll see I’m actually criticizing Renew America for using an inexperienced person to further their purposes without being responsible enough to edit him. It creates an impression they’re neither intelligent nor mature.

    Next time you write a piece for them, send it to me first. I’ll polish it up and have it back to you in a few minutes. Then you won’t have to read crap like this.

    –Tom

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