Chris Christie, one whale of a classy guy

Governor Mister Future President:

January, 9, 2012
Chris Christie to Occupy protester: You’re going down, sweetheart

After Christie took the stage, protesters changed their message to “Christie kills jobs!”

“Really?” Christie sneered, walking towards the protesters in a menacing way. “You know – something may go down tonight, but it ain’t gonna be jobs, sweetheart.”


“Get it? You’re going to suck a penis – because you’re female. That’s right. I heard your voice and I looked in your direction and I told myself ‘It’s a woman. This will be easy.’ And I said ‘Go suck a cock.’ Funny, huh? Now if YOU had insulted me based solely upon my appearance, you know what you’d be? A bitch. If you said I’d be in Cape May tonight wearing a bib and going down on a dead humpback whale, because I’m fat, what a bitch you’d be. If you said that I’d look like an over-cranked weedeater in a pail of paint as I tore through a whalefull of gut blubber, my only want in life being to tear open its belly and pack my mouth with scrumptious half-digested lobster tails I’d say: ‘Here’s a nickel, bitch – go buy yourself some class.'”

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