This president is so cool, he can’t help it. It’s just his nature. Speaking at a fundraiser not too far from here, he told an LGBT-friendly crowd: “My wife won’t suck my penis.” And the crowd erupted in both friendly and derisive laughter because that’s not their problem. Right? Oh Mr. President, you silly Commander Guy with your lonely saliva-free dong. You is lovable, in your lame hip-hop way like the Fresh Prince.

The quote came when Obama spoke of the first lady’s appearance on Ellen Degeneres’ show. Click for audio. (click)

I want to thank my wonderful friend who accepts a little bit of teasing about Michelle beating her in pushups — but I think she claims Michelle didn’t go all the way down. That’s what I heard. I just want to set the record straight — Michelle outdoes me in pushups as well. So she shouldn’t feel bad. She’s an extraordinary talent and she’s just a dear, dear friend — Ellen DeGeneres. Give Ellen a big round of applause.

And err whoops. I screwed it up. I see the joke was actually: “Ellen Degeneres said my wife won’t suck anyone’s penis.” Or: “Ellen Degeneres said my wife won’t suck her studio carpet’s penis.” Whatevs, my wife won’t put it in her mouth, and that’s the joke the President was trying to make. In order to win over the intransigent Hollywood insider CoJo/Ross the Intern constituency.

Did the Greatest Orator in the History of the Republic Make a Crude Sexual Joke About His Wife?
Sundries Shack | Jimmie

President Obama gave a speech Wednesday, a part of which genuinely boggled my mind. Now, I know you’re probably thinking I’ll quote a stirring bit of admiration of the heroes who stormed the beaches of Normandy so many years ago. After all, Wednesday was the anniversary of the Day of Days. But no. . .

Today’s mind-boggling moment cane [sic] during a speech at a fundraiser before an LGBT audience. . . in the midst of his remarks, he dropped one of the more inappropriate comments I’ve seen from a President since, well, the last Democrat we had in office. This is from the official pool report, as quoted by Todd Starnes of Fox News Radio.

“Michelle outdoes me in pushups as well,” he said, after saying that she’s taken some criticism on her technique “because she doesn’t go all the way down” – a line that he let hang, naughtily provoking laughter from the crowd.

Well, that ain’t the transcript, is it? Yeah, so? Who cares.

Did President Obama Just Make A Blowjob Joke?
So says the pool report from his gay and lesbian fundraiser at L.A.’s Beverly Wilshire tonight.
Incredibly awkward.

Buzzfeed, that. Dan Riehl:

Obama: Michelle “Doesn’t Go All The Way Down”

I’m thinking Barry didn’t want to go there at a gay and lesbian fund raising event. But he di-d!!

Then Dan gets the transcript.

Update: It Was A Gay Joke – Obama: Michelle “Doesn’t Go All The Way Down”

Update: Buzzfeed has added the transcript. Given that it was related to Ellen DeGeneres, the context becomes a bit more clear – or, less fuzzy, perhaps.

The joke was gay. Get it? I don’t. I’m thinking homo sex is all quantum mechanical to Dan. Good guess, pal. This was iOwnTheWorld’s take:

They’re having difficulty interpreting the President’s humor. Imagine trying to have sex with these people. Betsy’s Page:

Classy, President Obama, classy.

Ann Althouse plays the silly game Limbaugh made famous. You’re smart enough to know the truth, but you need the adulation and play both sides:

. . consider that Obama has a bone to pick — does that sound dirty to you? — with Bill Clinton right now, and given the strong association between Bill Clinton and blowjobs and the suspicion that Obama is currently pissed at Bill Clinton, he may have been engaging in some subtle jousting with Bill Clinton — does that sound dirty to you? —about the sexual proclivities of their respective wives.

So she puts up a ‘poll’ — “does that sound dirty to you?” (jeezus). And “Yes. Completely intentional, with a touch of deniability written in.” is winning handily.

Well here it is. The actual clip, where you see what happened:

The President was pissed.