Remember that hairband guitar player you used to see at 3:13 a.m. on Headbangers Ball, a quarter century ago? He’s still alive!
“Back in my country, my president [barf sign], he’s trying to pass a gun ban, so he’s staging all of these murders, like the ‘Fast And Furious’ thing down at the border, and Aurora, Colorado, all the people that were killed there. And now the, um, beautiful people at the Sikh temple.”
“God. Was talking to J.D. our promoter here tonight, what a great guy. I was saying, you know, I don’t know where I’m going to live if America keeps going the way it’s going because it looks like it’s turning into Nazi America. And he said ‘Move down here to Singapore.'”
Please. Do. And enjoy your new home dude.
Singapore society is highly regulated through the criminalization of many activities which are considered as fairly harmless in other countries. These include failing to flush toilets after use, littering, jaywalking, the possession of pornography, the sale of chewing gum, and sexual activity; such as oral and anal sex between men.
We should mention: if you’re caught with an ounce of cocaine, Mr. Coolass Drug Addict, you get the gallows. So do try to keep yourself under control, or, you know, skrkkk. No-funny neck-snappy ouchies. But yay for another country! And capital punishment! Boo hiss for healthcare!