Newt Gingrich tells followers “Obama is going to win”

Just days before the biggest importantest election in the history of the third rock from the sun, Definer of Civilization and Arouser of Those Who Form It Newt Gingrich shoots Mitt Romney’s campaign. No kidding. You heard me. Newt breaks the news to his e-mail slaves that Romney lost the election. There’s not thing-one anyone can do about it:

The email, titled “What’s really at stake this Tuesday …” came from Gingrich Marketplace – a newsletter coordinated by conservative news group Human Events.

“The truth is, the next election has already been decided. Obama is going to win. It’s nearly impossible to beat an incumbent president,” advertiser Porter Stansberry wrote in the email to Gingrich supporters. “What’s actually at stake right now is whether or not he will have a third-term.”

Apparently the Gingrich Marketplace missive was meant for the cutthroat titans in the second and third rings whirling around the mass of all political gravity, Newt, and not the Romneyfans in the sticks. So now the nobodies know what “Gingrich the historian applying the lessons of history to public life” has known for awhile and has been sharing with his Upper Moondog Thetans. Willard M. Romney: Dead Man Walking.

Conservative news group Human Events manages the Gingrich Marketplace emails, but Gingrich has a say over which advertisers can have their messages go out to the list . .

Human Events Vice President Joe Guerriero said the email was “a mistake.”

“It was actually scheduled to run on another of our lists,” Guerriero said.

And, no, Obama cannot legally run for a third term. Unless, once again, you-know-who already knows something we don’t.