Bryan Fischer on women soldiers

Bryan Fischer.

America’s daughters should not be sent into combat. Period.

This should be something. Let’s hear it.

Reports from the Marine training base at Parris Island indicate that only 45% of female Marines could throw a hand grenade far enough to keep from blowing themselves up. If you’re in a foxhole with a woman about to toss one of those, you’re not sure whether to treat her as friend or foe.

Dammit woman stop blowing me up. Try throwing some tea cozies or angry glances or whatever. Anything but another one of your suicide-ades.

Men have to do 20 pushups, women just six. Men have to do pull-ups, women just have to hang there for a while. In the obstacle course, a stool is placed in front of an 8-foot wall for our lovelies. But what if the enemy absent-mindedly forgets to set one of those up on the battlefield?

What if the enemy constructed a hair salon? And then the Marines were like “I need a blow dry” and they walked right in but then it was all “Huh? Al Qaeda?”

Female soldiers are twice as likely to suffer leg injuries and nearly five times as likely to suffer fractures as males. The Army gives women an extra three minutes to complete a two-mile run, which, of course, should be no problem.

Women don’t run, Sparky. That’s the way we like it. They’re staying put cuz’ running is for chickens and sack nylons.

Additionally, all of us ought to be concerned about what happens to female soldiers who become POWs in the hands of Muslims . .

What if the enemy did more than torture and kill prisoners? What then?

In recent weeks, the Muslim Brotherhood has actually paid Muslim gangs to sexually assault female Muslim protesters in Tahrir Square. How will the flower of our nation’s womanhood fare in the hands of savages like these?

How about ‘You wanna fuck, Akbar? I’ll fuck you to death. I’m an American, kiss my ass. Okay a little lower – yep, right there.’

There is a persistent but entirely false myth that the Israelis use women in combat. Well, they did. For three weeks. In 1948. And never again.

Their presence in combat, according to [Brian] Mitchell, resulted in a higher casualty count for both sides “Israeli men risked their lives and missions to protect their women, and Arab troops fought more fiercely to avoid the humiliation of being defeated by women” . .

Bottom line: women aren’t designed by God to serve in combat. If you don’t believe me, just ask the Israelis.

Ahem:

Three, two, one . .

UPDATE: even IDF has gone PC on women in combat

Apparently the IDF has gone totally PC on national defense, and the research on which my column yesterday was based, accurate at the time, is now outdated. The IDF was right before, and wrong now, but it looks like they’ll have to figure that out the hard way just like we will.

Ladies have fought in the Israel Defense Forces since 1948. Some day the country will lose a war and we’ll all come to appreciate Bryan’s wisdom.

According to the IDF, “Women…make up 3% of the IDF’s combat soldiers.”

Good luck with all that.

Good luck with your surviving! Good luck when it comes to your army ever doing anything! Good luck should it ever come to battle!

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2 thoughts Bryan Fischer on women soldiers

  1. avatar Rev. Howard Furst says:

    Mr. Fischer might do well to consult the Bible, wherein Jehovah seems perfectly fine with women at the front lines of battles, including Special Forces operations. The Book of Judith for example:

    1 Nebuchadnezzar’s War: (1-7:32) There is a military struggle underway, with the Persian forces invading the states to the west of its borders. Nebuchadnezzar’s army, led by Holofernes, besieges the hilltop town of Bethulia. The townspeople think that God has abandoned them, and beg their leaders to surrender. Playing for time, the leading citizen Uzziah suggests they pray, asking God for a further five days. If God does not deliver them in this time, they will surrender.

    2 Judith and the Elders: (8:1-9.14) The beautiful and respected Judith, a wealthy widow of Bethulia, confronts the town leaders. Their plan, she says, is not the right course of action. She herself has a secret plan, which she begins to put into action: she grooms herself so that she is alluringly beautiful, then leaves the city during the night.

    3 Judith and Holofernes: Judith meets and bowls over the enemy general, Holofernes. He plans to seduce her, but she turns the tables on him. She waits until he is drunk and sleeping, then she cuts off his head with his own sword.

    4 Aftermath, and the Song of Judith: She and her faithful maid take the head back to Bethulia, and display it from the outer walls of the town. When the enemy troops realize they have lost their leader they panic, and are easy prey for the Israelite troops. Judith is hailed as a national heroine.

    Mr. Fischer’s suggestion that women are unfit for battle is therefore Blasphemy. RTFB. One cannot simply pick and choose the parts of the Bible that serve one’s biases or agenda. All or none; uncompromising Biblical Literalism is an absolute requirement for attaining Oneness with Jehovah. Perhaps Mr. Fischer should find a different Scripture and Deity to suit his needs, as Jehovah’s Word doesn’t seem good enough for him. What a wuss.

  2. avatar toma says:

    To borrow Jon Stewart, this Judith would be less a “Let me do your taxes” Jew than a “Hold my Uzi while I take a piss” Jew. Or a “That’s a nice sword, can I see it?” Jew which pretty much makes her the only Elder of Zion who ever lived up to the hype. The good Reverend might be the one Bible-banger that’s read or remembers The Book. I feel this is all probably for the better as it’s a violent and hectoring tract, much like one of Judy Blume’s shatter-the-innocence and shred-the-hymen affronts to civilization.

    But then Bryan should know better? Please of course, no. What money is there in that? Using the Bible and knowing the Bible are two different things. As Ezekiel said in Plebeebians 18:19 “The fleecing of the weasels shall not come as bitter weather but as comfye blanket.” Sshhh. Something like that.

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