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Happy Gun And Battlefield Surgery Appreciation Day

you got a real purty barrel

All across America, giddy gun nuts brandishing their favorite acting Clint Eastwood squints and for real death factories gathered together today for the birthday of Martin Luther King Junior Gun Appreciation Day, a celebration of wasted human development and abated sexual adequacy. Though the meeting between the Southern Toofless, Midwestern Fatbags and Idaho You Name Its has the effect of soothing somewhat their common lust for Orlando Bloom’s haunches, the real goal of the day is to allow the routine mishandling of weaponry to result in public human slaughter rather than the paltry private offing of family pets, Nazi pottery and children. Thanks, it’s going well:

Emergency personnel had to be called to the scene of the Dixie Gun and Knife Show in Raleigh, North Carolina after a gun accidentally discharged and shot two people at the show’s safety check-in booth just after 1 pm. Both victims were transported to an area hospital, and the Raleigh Fire Department announced that the show would be closed for the rest of the day . .


UPDATE: Two similar incidents occurred at entirely separate gun shows in the Midwest, one in the Cleveland suburb of Medina, Ohio and the other at the state fairgrounds in Indianapolis, Indiana. In Ohio, the local ABC affiliate reports that one individual was brought to a hospital by EMS, and in Indiana Channel 8 WISH says that an individual shot himself in the hand while trying to reload his gun in the show parking lot. That brings the tally to 4 victims of gun violence so far at three different gun shows during the country’s first Gun Appreciation Day.


UPDATE: CNN is reporting that three people were injured at the gun show in Raleigh, not two as originally reported. All were victims of a shotgun that fired while the owner was removing it from a case.

3 shootings, 5 hospitalizations. On the plasma-splatter scale, I give it a hearty 10 pints.

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