Tell her the sausage factory is closed

Average therefore normal awesome America becomes apparently unhappy when a Boy Scout gets kissed on the mouth. This is a bad deal. Even though the Scout is a horny chick and the kisser is handsome Anderson Cooper, today’s Rock Hudson plus mountain fresh bleach. Unacceptable. Traditional America is wantin’ to give up stabbin’ sticks and wandrin’ dark tick-filled forests with child molesters if this keeps up. What with the boys kissing rich girls with big gazongas.

Anderson Cooper kisses “Boy Scout” to offend traditional America
Cliff Kincaid | Renew America

The headline says it all: “Anderson Cooper Kissed Madonna, Dressed In Boy Scout Uniform, at GLAAD Media Awards” . .

This was a deliberate effort to mock the Scouts for standing for traditional values and instructing young men to be “morally straight.” Anderson Cooper went along with the gag by “kissing” the faux Scout. It was supposed to be cute.

It was not. Cliff vomited in his mouth. And if he’d swallowed his corn-dog and beans lunch, a second time, he would have demonstrated the minimal talent necessary to earn himself the “Legal Proceedings Badge.” This a Scout gets for 1.) Poring over BSA civil court transcripts where they allege thirteen year-olds raped by their Scout leaders are not victims, but boyfriends, of said leaders, and 2.) Not cannon-hurling on a distant galaxy.

And should we take this Scouting revelation seriously, which followed the swearing of an oath, which my gosh they take seriously, we’d have to accept that Scouting routinely features thirtysomethings making tent pretzels of their newly pubescent [rrawf] boyfriends. So why does Cliff Kincaid care about this? So what if Anderson wants to steal a kiss from some soft-skinned Scout, with her curvaceous hips and heaving jugs?

As an Eagle Scout and father of three boys who also had some fun in Scouting, I don’t think it is right to mock this worthwhile program.

Ah, and maybe this is the point. Anderson and Madonna are legally permitted to commit whatever crimes against Jesus they like — unwed kissing between boys and girls, for example. But they shouldn’t do it in public just to mock the Boy Scouts. Closeted sexual experimentation (and pedophilia) is a traditional, worthwhile pursuit. Keep it naive. Keep it private. And keep it strictly same-sex, the Boy Scout way. Now that’s ‘some fun.’

Do most boys experiment with sex at Boy Scout camp?
Yahoo!Answers | Resolved Question | 4 years ago

When I was 12, I joined Boy Scouts. Since then I have attended summer camp every year. It has always been the same. Before going the first time, jacking off was something guys used to joke about and do in private. Not at camp! There, guys are doing it right in front of each other in the tents, woods and showers. Once, the first year, one of the counselors came into the shower after troop swim. Several of the guys were showing their erections to each other. The Counselor just said “Hurry up, other guys want to use the shower. You can do this stuff in the tents after lights out”. It was no big deal!

After saying “no” three times, I finally went into the woods with some other guys for a circle jerk. It was awesome! Everybody was squirting all over. Sometimes you could go hiking and find some guys doing more than jacking off.

My question is….are all scout summer camps like this??? . .

Dave S
Best Answer – Chosen by Voters

Yeah, that stuff went on at night at the scout camp I went to also. Mostly just jerking off with each other in the tents at night, but sometimes there would be a circle jerk in the woods.

Sometimes some guys would go further too! That’s where I first learned to give head.

You see Cliff’s point. Get Madonna out of there, at least.