You shoot Cujo in the first paragraph

If hypocrisy doesn’t make you want to throw down Jesus Christ’s yellow rose and march right off the set then something is wrong with you.

Stephen King and the Second Amendment
By Ron Capshaw | National Review

Stephen King has declared his support for gun control in an 8,000-word essay published by Amazon. In it, King condemns the NRA and advocates banning guns with more than ten rounds. He even goes beyond Obama’s pledge to protect hunting rifles and calls on hunters to give up “their sporting toys.”

He says he wants fewer guns in America. But . .

In The Stand, after millions of American citizens are wiped out by a “superflu” created in an Army lab, the libertarian argument of how helpless an unarmed citizenry would be in a country where only criminals and the Army have guns is validated in the book’s black-helicopter America.

And what happens?

Televised broadcasts show citizens in a lethal gauntlet between the army on one side and far-left terrorists on the other. Freedom of the press is eradicated as broadcasters are forced to read government propaganda with a gun literally pointed at their heads.

It’s like a nightmare.

In the more contemporary Desperation, a lone highway patrolman is able to capture whole groups of unarmed drivers. Without weapons, the captives are unable to prevent the police officer from killing a little girl. The captors escape and, rather than phoning the ACLU, obtain as many automatic weapons as possible.

Some kinda horror show.

And consider the novel Cujo. Had the mother been carrying even a hunting rifle she could have shot the rabid dog within seconds of encountering the animal, and thus spared her son a slow death.

Suppose you’re a wisp of a girl. Yes, you, with your dirty pillows. Suppose you’re the type for gym shower shenanigans. Suppose you can juggle knives with your mind. Suppose you can turn John Travolta’s car into a bonfire. Suppose you can turn John Travolta into a bonfire. Who more than you needs a Laser-Sighted Bushmaster M4A3 16″ Patrolman’s Carbine? Nobody. Are your schoolmates going to tease you? Not any more. When they vote you Prom Queen, you can be sure they mean it.