Why isn’t Katty Kay naked?

And an eternal mystery has been solved. A monkey obviously can use a computer.

. . if you look twice at news women, it’s hard not to think; “pole dancer.” Some media babes even help with suggestive stage names. Katty Kay of BBC and CPB comes to mind; surely not as bold as Pussy Galore, but much more aggressive than Kitty Whatshername.

Nightly news as the community sandbox. Katty Kay isn’t some stand-off Oxford toff, she’s your waiting nymph. I imagine this particular nut spotting Katty at a restaurant and chasing her around the bar, knocking over chairs. C’mere you little tease! With that name! You want it!

In spite of all the puffing about talent and sexual equality, the attributes most admired in news chicks are visual; face, d├ęcolletage, weight, and youth. Literacy or intelligence is not necessarily a show stopper if a girl has better twins, or legs, than a teleprompter.

Post inventory: we have got ‘pole dancer,’ ‘babes,’ ‘chicks,’ ‘pussy,’ ‘kitty,’ and also ‘twins.’ And we’ve got the mis-application of ‘show stopper.’ A considerable demonstration of male intelligence, surely. Let’s not forget this fact-factory calls itself ‘The American Thinker’. Fine, but tell me: Didn’t somebody once point at a big hump of rock and cry aloud ‘I call this thing Mount Hood!’? Of course they did, after Katty straddled a gangster 10,000 feet in the sky.

Yes, yes; there are exceptions. Call them tokens if you will. Andrea Mitchell, Doris Kerns Goodwin, Diane Rehm, and Barbara Walters would hardly qualify as spring chickens or eye candy.

Doris Kearns Goodwin, right. Kurns Goodwen. Kyrns Gudwyn, aye. So tell me Murph, given all the news babes flashing their ample twins, why do some network hags even exist? Do you know?

Media matrons are a testimony to tenure or the need to service homely, geriatric, or liberal demographics. Indeed, the public airways are no slouch when it comes to tokens. American Public Broadcasting has at least one aging, zaftig, black, female anchor.

Nice pejorative there after ‘aging’ and ‘zaftig’. He didn’t bother to type out w-i-l-d-e-b-e-e-s-t, but of course ‘female’ without ‘nude’ and ‘trampoline’ is disappointing enough.

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