The valorous Victor Davis Hanson destroys Rachel Jeantel

My back blew up Monday morning. Pushing thingies on the keyboard was simply too much for it. Until you’ve had a bad back, you can’t know the joys of reaching for a utensil or spying a shadow followed by huddling yourself three days left-sided in bed listening to talk radio because your quadratus lumborum simply couldn’t hang. Some backs got to give it up. Mine will give you the sheath off its nerve bundle if you drop your wallet. I believe this is yours? Pardon, now I must retire as I have a fiery anaconda to wrestle with and water stinging my eyes.

Victor Davis Hanson is a dick. Did you know?

In our unheroic age, victimhood has replaced valiant struggle.

In the globally connected and affluent world of the 21st century, we thankfully have evolved a long way from the elemental poverty, hunger, and ethnic, religious, and racial hatred that were mostly the norm . .

But. You see where this is going. Back in the day, Americans trudged fifty miles every morning to lop off their fingers at the razor works for nothing more than rest room chits. And what for lunch break? Molten basalt, if you were lucky. Those were the days me droogies. The Kaiser didn’t think we were suicidal, but we sure showed him. Death was our handmaiden though you know what they say about familiarity, blah blah.

Yes this is Victor’s game. BORING. Hah, yes, but wait, I thought this part was funny. After skewering Bob Filner, Anthony “Carlos Danger” Weiner, Eliot “Client #9” Spitzer (feast your self upon the po-mo angst – sshhh – the experts call it “sex”), environmentalists, San Francisco, John Steinbeck, the Hetch Hetchy reservoir, Jay-Z, Eugene Debs, Beyoncé and Cuba (the socialist being the obvious linchpin between race music, Che Guevara and L’Oreal), Vic settled upon his greatest target. And what a demolition.

Much has been written about Rachel Jeantel, routinely described as the prosecution’s “star witness” in the George Zimmerman trial, almost as if she were some sort of new-generation civil-rights icon.

The reluctant teenage witness. She must be…Taken Out.

. . but from her testimony and her post-trial interviews for hire, we learned that Ms. Jeantel was confident and savvy about using electronic media while at the same time apparently illiterate, given that she could not read “cursive.” Yet whose fault is it that she preferred to post obscenities rather than scroll over to a book?

All her fault. The foul-word texting monster.

She admitted that her original testimony under oath was not fully accurate: Trayvon Martin, we now learn, wanted to “whoop ass” and so threw the first blow against Zimmerman. Yet Jeantel did not say that at the trial; she was quite willing to see the defendant convicted on false testimony.

She didn’t say a word about what she thought maybe Trayvon was thinking. Not that she was asked. If that isn’t hearsay-perjury, your honor, of the rankest sort.

Jeantel was unapologetic about her use of “retarded” as a putdown, her preposterous homophobic accusations that George Zimmerman could have been some sort of crazed gay rapist, and her casual use of slurs like “bitch,” “nigga,” and “crazy ass cracker.”

A KKK member to boot.

True, Jeantel is impoverished and no doubt “underserved” by a host of government agencies entrusted with providing support to the less well off. Yet by both past American and present global standards, she is not victimized in the sense of suffering hunger, unaddressed health problems, or lack of access to technology.

She’s no more ‘poor’ than she is ‘deadbeat.’ Rachel has had it far easier than any National Review writer, that’s for sure. How she manages to conspicuously loom like an éminence grise over Victor D. Hanson’s world is a mystery.

In today’s topsy-turvy world, we are to emphasize the untruth that Ms. Jeantel is poor in the Dickensian sense, while ignoring the truth that her matter-of-fact worldview is by contemporary liberal benchmarks homophobic, racist, and misogynistic — and entirely contrary to the race-blind meritocracy that a much poorer, much more heroic generation of civil-rights leaders once sacrificed for…

And she’s nowhere near being Ghandi. Burn. OH it’s true – Victor really got Rachel on that one. Shouldn’t we remind ourselves what a ‘hero’ is supposed to be like? Let’s do.

Victor Davis Hanson [b. 1953] is the Martin and Illie Anderson Senior Fellow at the Hoover Institution; his focus is classics and military history.

Hanson was a National Endowment for the Humanities fellow at the Center for Advanced Studies in the Behavioral Sciences, Stanford, California (1992–93), a visiting professor of classics at Stanford University (1991–92), the annual Wayne and Marcia Buske Distinguished Visiting Fellow in History at Hillsdale College (2004–), the Visiting Shifron Professor of Military History at the US Naval Academy (2002–3),and the William Simon Visiting Professor of Public Policy at Pepperdine University (2010).

Got it. Meanwhile with some luck, some day, Rachel Jeantel will finish high school. Victor just blew the fat part of a National Review post exposing the ‘un-heroism’ of this liberal icon. I wonder why.