Probably Wingnut of the Year (thx Pajamas Media)

This is how it began.

October 4th, 2013, will forever be known as the day I fell into a giant porn hole.

The fight against perverts in a small library in Illinois.

Imagine my surprise when I took my children for an outing with a friend to the Orland Park Public Library to look at books, surf the web and just have a relaxing afternoon. Instead I discovered an adult “masturbation lounge” lurking within a few hundred feet of the unsuspecting teen area.

This war on obscure biblioteque wankers has become a daily feature at Pajamas Media, delivering a homeschooling mom from the fringes of village crankdom to the bright lights of PJ’s “Lifestyle” section. Ladies and gentleman meet the new sensation… Megan Fox.

No, not that one. This one:

Yes. Until she got hired for the lofty gig at “Voices From a Free America”, where intellectuals like Roger Simon, Roger Kimball and Andrew Klavan hold forth, she was barely an internet presence at all. A few people had seen her at the YouTube channel she dubbed “Story Time with Megan Fox.” There, as “intolerantfox”, she warned parents against buying popular books that were too terribly disgusting for children to read. Here, in the preview for Episode 7, she inveighs against Cristina Garcia’s work:

On this episode of “Story Time with Megan Fox”, we look at the book “Dreaming in Cuban”…another book full of sex, vulgarity, and pro-communist propaganda that is being forced on children via school libraries and assigned reading lists. Do you now what your children are reading?

In the video, she scoffs:

Your first clue that this is not going to be a novel that you want your child to read. The very, very first page is called ‘Ordinary Seductions.’ Do you see that? Ordinary seductions. Right off the bat. Just right there. I didn’t have to go very far, did I, to find inappropriate material? This book is set in Cuba. The main character, there’s four main characters. The first one is Celia, she works for the commies.

She also hosted a heroically obscure site titled of course “Intolerant Fox.” Don’t laugh too loud as it was apparently the blog’s mix of right-wing mommy hectoring and cautionary listicles that scored Megan a mat at PJ’s brain gymnasium:

Posted on September 21, 2013 by Megan Fox

Picture it: You’re on a business trip and that girl from marketing with the low cut blouse is handing you a hotel key and offering a no-strings attached night of heaven and your wife will never find out. Before you make a move, consider the following very good reasons to say no.

3. You could break your penis.

No seriously, you could. There was an actual study done on this.

And so the intellectual right-crowd have a fresh, new voice. Megan Fox:

It’s the latest leg of Megan’s improbable journey that’s particularly fascinating. While checking out scandalous books for her YouTube gig she caught sight of boobs on a user computer. She attacked librarians in outrage. Then she descended upon a library board meeting with Hillbuzz’s Kevin DuJan in tow (who couldn’t be more pissy about library workers’ manners), and then (and crucially) she jimmied her way into the library’s incident reports by way of the Freedom of Information Act.

I would like to briefly note that none of this would have happened if the librarian who rudely chased me out of the children’s area (like an angry ghost haunting the stacks) would have just let me use a computer there like I had very nicely asked. I would have never known about the library’s terrible porn policy (they don’t have one) or about the numerous sex crimes that have occurred there (many, going back years and years). They could have continued catering to pedophiles completely unmolested carefree, but for the rudeness of a single employee, who will be forever be known as Kathy the Library Poltergeist. I would like to take a moment to formally thank this harridan on the taxpayer payroll.

The homeschoolin’ mother of two badly needed a respectable platform from which to take down her neighborhood library, the “PORN AND PERVERTS” clearinghouse. So now it’s Megan’s War that’s prominently featured at Pajamas Media. The cerebellists at PJ Lifestyle being roundly justified in pulling her on board, this week proved to be nothing short of epic. On Monday, she posted this harrowing report (with commentary) from back in early 2007:

This redacted internal “Incident Report” from Orland Park Library details when a man exposed himself to another man in the bathroom.

“While I was standing at the urinal, he came up behind me and said ‘You know they used to have a sign that said all penises hang out here.’ And then he laughed. The man thought [the complainant] was gay. Then he pulled his pants down all the way and went to use the urinal.”

It appears like the person who did this may be mentally disabled or suffer from some other problem, but shouldn’t police have been informed so they could come make sure he was not a threat?

Someone might check if the guy’s in a sanitarium now as it was, you know, years and years ago. On Tuesday, it was this report from October of 2008:

This free and easy access to pornography has led to a sexually charged environment in which many illegal sex acts occurred where police presence was needed. In this part of the continuing investigation into Orland Park Public Library’s dangerous policies that allow sex offenders to watch pornography unfettered, I report how internal documents were recovered that indicated staff also have let several crimes go unreported to police. The following is one of the reports.

“Patron was using a computer upstairs in the IT commons. She said the patron next to her was rubbing his lower area. She told XXXXX about this. He was still there. He had IT staff move patron to another computer.”

Can’t swing a dead cat in this orgy without clotting a freak. Could the perversions be any more sensational? I’m not sure, walk me back to the computer where I started. On Wednesday, Megan posted this report from August 2009:

The following internal “Incident Report” reveals that a man was witnessed “fully exposed” and masturbating. A staff member of Orland Park Public Library tells him he will be “banned from the library on second occurrence.” (Emphasis mine.)

“Patron may have exposed himself to other patron.

Spoke with person – advised he would be banned from the library on second occurrence.”

To be honest, that might have been disturbing. If it happened. It might even be more disturbing if it had happened to Megan. Nonetheless chalk a penis up for Pajamas Media. What the hell give one to Vodka Pundit too, we’re in a holiday mood. Now that’s it’s Thursday of course, we have another incident from two years ago:

In today’s revelations of what is going on over at the Orland Park Public Library, we have a document written by Library Director Mary Weimar in response to a mother who complained about a very suspicious person.

“She said she was sitting on the lobby bench closest to the Lucky Dog collection. When her 6 yr. old daughter came up to her, the teenage boy on the bench next to her asked her how old her daughter was, ‘said she was a cutie’ then touched himself.”

To summarize, a mother with three children just coming out of story time was asked by a teenager how old her 6 year old was. When she told him, he said ‘she’s a cutie’ and touched himself in front of the child.

To summarize, a fifteen year-old may have touched his body while saying “cutie.” Though I could be playing the incident down somewhat, as teenage pedophiles are probably dumb enough to yank their cranks at the library. I can’t imagine why the police weren’t summoned immediately. Why wasn’t the poor kid inevitably and permanently horrified at the idea of casual conversation, angry mommies, libraries specifically and Orland Park in general? For the rest of his life?

Well now. None of that matters, because we’re talking about public boobs here. On a library computer, in Cook County, Illinois. And we’re talking about such atrocities because book-hating homeschooler Megan Fox saw them. If on that account the white knights at Pajamas Media can’t turn Orland Park upside down, by way of old paperwork, then what the hell good is the First Amendment?


3 thoughts Probably Wingnut of the Year (thx Pajamas Media)

  1. avatar c u n d gulag says:

    Why would looking at boobs make her upset?

    Every time she looks in the mirror, she sees a boob.
    And when she take off her bra, she sees her breasts.

  2. avatar Peanutcat says:

    What a stupid twit . . . . .

  3. avatar A. J. says:

    No more calls. We have a winner!

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