Even Microsoft thinks Microsoft sucks (I agree…)

I’ve been locked out of my e-mail for two days now.

Microsoft: Microsoft help desk. Are you having a problem with Windows?

Me: I can’t get into my e-mail. Something about a security code?

Microsoft: Ah yes. We’re updating our security. You need an assigned security code now to access your account.

Me: I assume I can get one from my account, like through my settings.

Microsoft: Yes sir.

Me: But you’ve locked me out of my account.

Microsoft: Yes.

Me: Right.

Microsoft: So we’ll have to send you one.

Me: Please don’t say you’ll send it to my account.

Microsoft: We could send it to your account.

Me: Of course.

Microsoft: But we’d prefer to send it to another account.

Me: I figured that out from the two hours I’ve spent so far clicking through an endless series of screens, all of which kicked me out of Hotmail.

Microsoft: Do you have another account?

Me: I do.

Microsoft: Good.

Me: It’s a Hotmail account.

Microsoft: Oh that’s no good.

Me: Because you guys aren’t secure?

Microsoft: I didn’t say that.

Me: But that’s the reason why.

Microsoft: We’re only updating our security.

Me: You wouldn’t want to verify an unsecure account with another unsecure account?

Microsoft: We’re trying to provide you with the best security possible.

Me: So you need a third account.

Microsoft: An account from another provider.

Me: Any e-mail as long as it has nothing to do with Microsoft.

Microsoft: Right.

Me: And you don’t see a problem with this?

Microsoft: Excuse me?

Me: Asking Yahoo to do Microsoft’s job?

Microsoft: I’m sorry?

Me: Microsoft’s own accounts are so bad that they need another company to verify them.

Microsoft: I didn’t say…

Me: Microsoft can’t secure its own e-mail but its pretty sure that Yahoo can.

Microsoft: All we need is…

Me: Yes another e-mail address, anything that isn’t Microsoft, I get it. But I don’t have one.

Microsoft: [silence]

Me: [silence]

Microsoft: We need another e-mail account.

Me: I don’t have one.

Microsoft: [silence]

Me: [silence]

Microsoft: [silence]

Me: The last person I talked to said I should go to another provider and open an account.

Microsoft: Yes, then we can send the security code to that account.

Me: Then I can get back into my e-mail.

Microsoft: Right.

Me: And there’s no other way.

Microsoft: There’s no other way.

Me: And why wouldn’t I stay there?

Microsoft: [pause] Pardon me?

Me: Why wouldn’t I just stay with Yahoo?

Microsoft: [silence]

Me: Why not close my two Hotmail accounts and go with somebody who knows what they’re doing? Like Yahoo.

Microsoft: Umm…

Me: Microsoft is pretty sure Yahoo knows how to do this stuff. E-mail. And security.

Microsoft: [silence]

Me: [silence]

Microsoft: All we need is a …

Me: Never mind the evidence you have that I’m me – two separate accounts to draw upon, one of them is like ten years old, you don’t trust yourself. So that’s not good enough. Here I am telling you that I’m me, but you don’t trust me either. So that’s not good enough. You want me to go over to Yahoo and open an e-mail account there, then you’ll e-mail that account, and then everything will be fine. The security problems will be taken care of. After all they’re Yahoo, right?

Microsoft: [silence]

Me: [silence]


One thought Even Microsoft thinks Microsoft sucks (I agree…)

  1. avatar ^. Mabe says:

    Microsoft sucks

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