There’s no bigger fan of the Whiteskins

A friend of mine passes this along. The author of the e-mail will detail how he humiliated the New York Times’ Clarence Page.

Dear Mr. Page,

I always love your articles and I generally agree with them. I would suggest, as in an email I received, they [Redskins] change the name to the “Foreskins” to better represent their community, paying tribute to the dick heads in Congress.

‘Dickhead’ is now two words.

Here are some other politically correctness to consider:

I agree with our Native American population. I am highly insulted by the racially charged name of the Washington Redskins. One might argue that to name a professional football team after Native Americans would exalt them as fine warriors, but nay, nay. Let’s ditch the Kansas City Chiefs, the Atlanta Braves and the Cleveland Indians.

We’re all agreed. About the Native Americans, the Native Americans know best. This is an e-mail I can finally get behind.

If your shorts are in a wad because of the reference the name Redskins makes to skin color, then we need to get rid of the Cleveland Browns.

Isn’t it all so clever? But no the Browns were not named after Joe Louis, that’s an old racial feint. The team was named after its owner Paul Brown. But go on.

The Carolina Panthers obviously were named to keep the memory of militant Blacks from the 60’s alive. Gone. It’s offensive to us white folk.

Sarcasm? And HOW heap big e-mail. Carolina’s NFL team was named after Bobby Seale, of course, the Black Power activist who somehow commandeered the NFL in the Vietnam era. Which is why the Oakland Raiders are today the most storied franchise in football, cough.

Let’s dispense with the sports trivia please and let’s simply agree that black people being political is by definition offensive to whites. Because…? I know I’d throw rocks at the Greensboro M.L. Kings if their stupid baseball team came to my town.

The New York Yankees offend the Southern population. Do you see a team named for the Confederacy? No! There is no room for any reference to that tragic war that cost this country so many young men’s lives.

…that cost this country 600,000 lives at least. So you’re God Damned Right we wouldn’t name a team after the Confederacy.

Because there is no room for any reference to that tragic war.

There is no room as well for reference to a racial genocide that cost this country millions of more lives at the hands of the same sport-lovin’ dixie-whistlin’ sort. No mention of that at least in the world of big-time athletics where coaches, owners, A.D.s and mega-corporate television networks are all above playing politics for profit. The University of Las Vegas still call themselves the Runnin’ Rebels, incidentally…