Chuck Todd rocks Meet The Press

Chuck Todd, the Dude, hosted his first Meet The Press this weekend. And if you thought that former host David Gregory was shallow, glib and an unctuous creation of the village hive-mind, then Chuck just might be your man. He’s dumb, insensitive, impatient, impervious to the answers from his first guest (…some guy, the president…), prone to wielding cliches, to speaking in broken English, and repeating himself, because Chuck has a point, a point, his point – eh what? – and, also, prone, again, to saying the same thing over and over. Because why would the outside-of-Chuck world matter any more when you’re the new host of Meet This Fraternity Guy, Chuck freakin’ Todd?

Say, Mister President-Man. The guys from ISIS are pretty scary, yeah? Scary to you. Right, or what? To you. Huh?

PRESIDENT OBAMA: […] It is an abortion — a distortion — an abomination of that — that has, you know, somehow tied Islam to the kind of nihilistic thinking that any civilized nation should — should eliminate.

CHUCK TODD: Did you — did you see those messages they sent to you, naming you, when they — when they — when they beheaded those American journalists?


CHUCK TODD: They sent messages addressing you personally. Did you watch ’em?

Don’t just say ‘Yes,’ ANSWER me! Did you SEE them? Did you WATCH them? Did you become AWARE of them?? And then, shortly, Chuck’s follow-ups: Did you CRY? Did you PUKE?! Were there CHUNKS?! Awesome!

The president might avoid taking the lurid acts of ISIS personally because that’s precisely what they want. Terrorists try to make their public behavior your private problem. But Chuck is so fascinated with the prospect of the president being upset by New Kids On The Jihad he can’t let it go. Just think if the president wet his pants over this…SCOOP OF THE CENTURY.

PRESIDENT OBAMA: Did I — I was — I review — as part of our overall counterterrorism effort, I review all the social media of many of these groups. And then these are – this isn’t the first organization to deploy social media. This is increasingly [blah blah]…

CHUCK TODD: I’m just curious. You know, when they address you like that and they behead an American, I mean, does it — what — how does that impact you?

C’mon maaan, you can tell me. This is the sort of professionalism and adult-style discourse we’re meant to expect from Chuck’s Sunday Bro Corner from now on. Look for the emergence of some sort of denouement for special guests at the top of the hour, like, “Mr. Prime Minister – BOXERS OR BRIEFS?”