Category: attack of the wuss

A case of nth-degree boobiary Ebola Panic

The truth is that Ebola virus really isn’t much of a threat. It’s only about as contagious as hepatitis. Unless you have some pressing need to go walking hand-in-hand with strangers along the Mesurado river, it’s something you can easily avoid. Ebola panic however is another story.

Sen. Rand Paul of Kentucky declared on “The Laura Ingraham Show” that “this could get beyond our control” and worried, “Can you imagine if a whole ship full of our soldiers catch Ebola?”…

Rep. Paul Ryan of Wisconsin floated the idea of quarantining airline passengers in the affected African countries before they could fly out. “We’re learning a lot about how it’s spread but the question is ‘How can a person just jump on a plane and get here without a quarantine period of 21 days,’ which I believe is recommended,” he said on a radio talk show Wednesday.

Can you imagine quarantining the thousands of people who arrive here from West Africa every day? Can you imagine lying so shamelessly about a Centers for Disease Control recommendation? Fuck you, Paul Ryan.

You know what’s a good way to deal with this problem? When an African man shows up in your Dallas emergency room with flu-like symptoms, you ask him: “Are you Liberian?” Here’s a sensible one: “Did you just fly here from Liberia?” And then there’s this corker: “Have you recently been in close contact with any Liberians dying from Ebola, in Liberia?” Asking even one of these practical questions of a vomiting stranger could give your puzzled medical staff valuable hints as to what they’re dealing with, but your mileage may vary. Notwithstanding: Booo! That’s not how these clusterfucks go, so now we’ve got a full-blown case of American Ebola Tremons. Matthew Continetti:

We are told that Benghazi was a spontaneous demonstration, that al Qaeda is on the run, that the border is secure as it has ever been, that Assad must go, that I didn’t draw a red line, the world drew a red line, that the IRS targeting of Tea Party groups involved not a smidgen of corruption, that the Islamic State is not Islamic…

The system can withstand only so many shocks.

Remember when those four guys were killed in Libya? It looked like sheer panic in my neighborhood, I can tell you.

The response by our government has been denial and delusion. But that has further alienated the public, and it won’t be long before things get really weird. Maybe it is time for the political class to panic, too.

Know hope? That’s passé.

Know fear.

You hear that? SShh! Did you HEAR THAT? This would be ghost whispering for our wingnut pals. If only the simple suggestion of ghosts having ears wouldn’t cause an outbreak of volcanic incontinence. THEY CAN HEAR YOU? Then there’s Jonah Goldberg.

If I were in charge of overseas contingency operations at the Islamic State or al-Qaeda, I would send as many suicide-bomber types back to America (and France and Britain) with a new weapon: Ebola.

What a mensch.

I’d tell them: Take as many connections as you can on the flight home. Help people with their luggage whenever possible. Leave a mess in the plane bathroom and a paper trail of your travels that will foment panic when ultimately revealed.

Really a helpful sort.

Have fun for as long as you can and maybe share your spit, sweat, and other stuff in as many creative ways as you can. See a show. Go to a water park and just hang out in the lazy river all day. Eat at a nice restaurant, leave a messy napkin. Don’t bother to wash your hands — and never flush (or if you do, make sure the toilet overflows!).

The Salt of the Girth. He is.


The passion of the unconscious wife, by Andrew McCarthy

Andrew McCarthy takes a breather from whacking his Mohammed piñata to defend our Men of the Gridiron.

The progressive soap-opera storyline of the Rice coverage is that our aggressive, competitive culture, which has made the NFL so popular, desensitizes men to the gravity of domestic violence; that women are uniformly outraged by this state of affairs; and that football and the men who play it must be tamed.

I don’t recall; the men of football; needing to be tamed. Someone however has run amok with the use of fancy punctuation. But that’s no excuse for being a, what other less-cultured bloggers might call, “blithering idiot.”

ESPN’s Sports Center reported, incredulously, that many female Ravens fans proudly wore their No. 27 jerseys… One woman, clad in her Rice jersey, explained that while she did not condone his behavior, Rice had said he was sorry and was deserving of a second chance, just like other people who have done abominable things.


A second female Rice fan conceded that there was no excuse for the running back’s violent aggression, but contended that it was for the legal system, not the NFL, to punish him.

I can imagine how fans would greet the return of Ray Rice, legendary wife beater – with prominent cheers and boos. This would likely be accompanied by a smattering of home-grown fistfights in the stands. Why the NFL would be leery of such a spectacle is puzzling. Why can’t the big boys just play ball, mommy? Why can’t all football players play every Sunday afternoon? Andy hambing a sportz sadz, sniff. Here’s the point:

Through all of this, the ESPN anchor played the role of amen-corner, not interviewer. There was no suggestion that the women clad in Rice jerseys might have some valid points — it was simply accepted that they were well-meaning simpletons who, like schoolboys, need “reprogramming.”

Oh please, women are the only sensible people on the planet. You never see them, for example, marrying serial killers wasting away in jail. Here’s the round up, pardner:

1.) Progressives say women are “uniformly outraged by this state of affairs.”
2.) But some women, “incredulously,” are not.
3.) You and Bono should listen to these people.

Say, where’s Janay Palmer? Is she conscious yet? Can you speak, dear? The world would love to hear from you.

“To take something away from the man I love that he has worked” for all his life is “horrific,” she said. “Ravensnation we love you!” she added.

Good enough for me. This would be a brand new way of dealing with domestic violence, by the way.


Sean Hannity files actual war report, accidentally

Israel’s war in Gaza winds down – we hope – and some sense of twisted normalcy perhaps settle in. The victors may feel as if they’ve gotten the dirty job done, but the one-sided carnage has shocked millions of people.

The news media weren’t to blame for the worldwide reaction. They merely reported on events as they unfolded. Missiles strikes on trapped and unarmed civilians are certainly newsworthy events, in the ‘if it bleeds, it leads’ tradition, so they were only doing their jobs.

You may recall that Fox News’ Sean Hannity has a media job as well.

I think there are too many Hamas representatives put on the air. I don’t think enough emphasis has been put on the lives of the average Israeli. Where’s CBS? Where is all this so-called reporting on NBC and CNN?

Sean spent the last four days overseas reporting on the bloodshed. From Israel.

I stayed two days on the Israeli-Gaza border and speaking with the mayor of Sderot, and going to an indoor playground because the kids can’t go out, where rockets landed five minutes before the cease fire. It gives you perspective of how dire the situation is.

It would be more desperate for the little kids if they didn’t have a second playground, indoors. It would be worse for them if their first playground had gotten blown up along with many of their friends. Of the 1500 Palestinian civilians killed so far, at least 300 of them were children. I don’t know how many of the war’s three Israeli civilian fatalities were also children. I should know that grim statistic by heart, and MSNBC has obviously failed.

TVNewser: Overall do you think the U.S. media has been balanced in its coverage of the current conflict?

Hannity: Absolutely, positively not. I think it was interesting when I asked the Prime Minister about it in a round-about way. He challenged the media, saying to reporters ‘now that you are not under the threat of Hamas, now you can tell the story.’ How they are using mosques and hospitals as shields. He was challenging the media to tell that story.

So we’ve been blessed this week with Sean Hannity’s perspective on the war.

…I thought the story wasn’t being told from the side of the average Israeli. As I’m leaving I feel like we gave a good picture, with context and texture about what life is like in these border towns.

And I commend him for that. No kidding. Really:

To be perfectly honest, I got comfortable with the sirens. On the first night, I was in restaurant and the sirens went off, and people, including IDF soldiers, casually walked into a bathroom, and it was no big deal. And at the end of the day I understood it.


The solipsism of Dick Cheney

I apologize for being absent so long. I have a job that eats up most of my time, and then there’s a freewheeling World Cup that’s amazing and brilliant. But there are also other things.

There is a former vice president who crawls out of his taxpayer subsidized transplant-ward hospital bed to remind us how trivial human life is. Other human life.

“I think we did what we had to do,” Cheney added, saying he is still not convinced Iraq didn’t have weapons of mass destruction before the 2003 invasion. “And you don’t get to go back and say, well, we would have — what if we’d ignored all the intelligence?”

If he’d ignored his own cooked-up intelligence there’d be 4,500 ghosts incarnate watching the Americans take it to Belgium on Tuesday afternoon. I’m not scared of the possibility, I welcome them all. But it’ll never happen of course. The prospect would require an apology from Dick Cheney and a time machine, and the former, as we all know, is a complete fiction. Even if he could go back, there’d be little point in it while there are still so many Americans to be burned on the bonfire of his endless desires.

“The Rand Corporation just recently published a study that shows there’s been a 58 percent increase in the number of al Qaeda-type terrorist groups in the last four years. Fifty-eight percent! Doubling the number of terrorists roughly, and they’re spreading out from West Africa all across North Africa to East Africa, up through the Middle East, all the way around to Indonesia…”

“Are you indicating that we could be on track for something worse than 9/11?” [Hasslebeck] asked…

“You know, I can’t say at this point specifically when something like that might happen. But it would be foolish of us to ignore the extent to which there are people who — terrorist-sponsoring states who have in fact tried to provide nuclear technology.”

Summer rerun. They’ll shove an atom bomb up your ass or I’m not Dick Cheney. This man has stared his own death in the face, has watched thousands die in Iraq, has been acutely aware that he’s responsible for the slaughter, and hasn’t been moved by any of it. Dick sleeps like a baby.

Which brings me to a Charles Pierce piece. He decries the rising tide of cruelty in our country, particularly as it seeps into our politics.

It does not have to be this way. After the greatest exercise of systematized cruelty in the country’s history, Abraham Lincoln gave the greatest speech ever given by an American president, and in its greatest passage, he called hold, enough.

With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation’s wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan, to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations.

Lincoln’s second inaugural struck me. But not in the usual way, as I paid new attention to this part: “…with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right…” Lincoln tells us about managing to make good decisions: We have “to see the right.” It’s something that must be understood before it can be done. Given a complex situation the best choice isn’t the immediate impulse that comes from your gut, to be defended at all costs. Choosing right over wrong is something that needs to be worked at.

This is what Dick Cheney rejects. He is right before he can know the first thing. He is right when he invades Iraq. He is right at the same time all his predictions about the war are wrong. He is right while Americans there by the thousands are being killed. Now we’re out of Iraq and he’s right to demand we send soldiers back in, regardless of how predictably they’ll suffer and die. Right and wrong do not exist outside of Dick Cheney, and these things never will.


Let’s not play politics with Sgt. Bergdahl’s life

Let’s remember a few key things while the feat of Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl’s life being saved by the Obama administration is savagely criticized by Republicans.

The War in Afghanistan is winding down. At the height of troop deployment we had over 100,000 service personnel fighting over there. We now have about 32,800. While it’s painful to acknowledge their deaths, we are losing far fewer soldiers than we once did. On average five Americans are being killed every month in 2014. That’s far less than the 40 or more that were being killed a couple years ago.

And that toll will continue to shrink. The number of American combat troops will drop to only 9,800 by the end of the year. The long War in Afghanistan is nearly over.

Now. This:

Surrender without honor
Obama swap with Taliban endangers the country
NEW YORK DAILY NEWS • June 4, 2014

This is how the right-wing views a prisoner swap with the locals we’re leaving behind. It’s disturbingly reminiscent of what the Axis Powers were forced to do at the end of World War II, isn’t it? We wait with bated breath to hear the final details of their Marshall Plan.

President Obama betrayed the highest obligation of his office — safeguarding national security — in trading five hard-core Taliban for the American serviceman…

Don’t all prisoner swaps work this way? They get the soldiers they want, and we get ours? This sort of thing happens as a war comes to an end. To my knowledge no prisoner exchange has ever started a genocide. The five will be held and monitored in Qatar for the next year, and then the American deployment in Afghanistan will be very small. I know I still feel safe and secure going to The Gap. Anything else?

…for the American serviceman who appears to have deserted in Afghanistan.

Now we get to the problem. We don’t like the soldier you saved. It’s a familiar Republican game, treason by association.

But it’s not really up to the President to decide what kind of soldier Bergdahl has been. It’s first up to the professionals to decide that – the Army – and then for them to come to conclusions only after a lengthy inquiry. No one can even try to do that until the sergeant returns home to tell investigators what happened.

Nonetheless conservatives want this president to play politics with soldiers’ lives. After all, they get to do it:

[Taliban commander] Nadeem told the Times that Bergdahl taught him basic ambush techniques and how to turn a cell phone into a remote control for a roadside bomb.

At the time, Afghan intelligence officials also believed Bergdahl was “cooperating with the Taliban” and advising fighters at a base in Pakistan.

Now some are wondering whether it wasn’t a setup – whether Bergdahl defected and then agreed to the prisoner exchange to free the five top Taliban prisoners held at Guantanamo Bay.

And if you can’t believe what the Taliban tell you, then who can you believe?

Maybe this Bergdahl character is a troubled individual, I don’t know. But it’s obvious to me that conservatives are far more bloodthirsty and disturbed in the playing of their politics. When the voters elected Obama president and commander-in-chief (twice), they demanded he hold himself to a higher standard. If he’d made any calculations last week about whether saving this guy’s life would look good on Fox News, he’d have let us down.


Prisoners – OF SEX

Ross Douthat — this man has ideas. Fine and good thoughts they are — but I may not agree with them. Take this Santa Barbara spree killer for instance — no I don’t mean literally. You don’t wanna put this guy in your pocket — he could stab your balls.

Twitter movements have been created, think pieces written, and all kinds of cultural phenomena — from Judd Apatow movies to “pickup artists” and Rhonda Byrne’s “The Secret” — have been invoked, analyzed and blamed.

And in fairness to the think pieces — I have to be fair, because I’m writing one — in this particular tragedy, the killer’s motives really do seem to have a larger cultural significance.

I’d normally say this poor guy is nuts — but he’s not.

The Santa Barbara killer’s pulsing antipathy toward women, his shame and fury over sexual inexperience — these were amplified horribly by mental illness, yes, but visit the angrier corners of the Internet, wander in comment threads and chat rooms, and you’ll recognize them as extreme versions of an all-too-commonplace misogyny.

You could say he’s a lunatic — but you would be missing the point.

I’ve written before, in the context of the abuse that female writers take online, about this poisoned stream’s potential origins. The Santa Barbara case hints at one such source — the tension between our culture’s official attitude toward sex on the one hand and our actual patterns of sexual and romantic life on the other.

He’s a product of cultural tension — between what Charlize Theron wants and the way Ross Douthat behaves.

The culture’s attitude is Hefnerism, basically, if less baldly chauvinistic than the original Playboy philosophy. Sexual fulfillment is treated as the source and summit of a life well lived, the thing without which nobody (from a carefree college student to a Cialis-taking senior) can be truly happy, enviable or free.

And holy cow we land here, of course. I don’t in the least believe that dorky Hugh Hefner got rich by leading America astray. Middle class America wanted to fuck, really bad, Hugh told them to do it. And they did — surprise. But ever since that day, for dear Ross, the country has been playing a game of blind man’s bluff. As it is dogma with most conservatives, no one can have any sex and remain sane. There’s a legal asylum for such mental illness — it’s known as ‘Marriage.’ And how stoked are you about that?

Meanwhile, social alternatives to sexual partnerships are disfavored or in decline: Virginity is for weirdos and losers, celibate life is either a form of unhealthy repression or a smoke screen for deviancy…

This essay began: where? There was a young man: he had a problem?

…the kind of intense friendships celebrated by past civilizations are associated with closeted homosexuality, and the steady shrinking of extended families has reduced many people’s access to the familial forms of platonic intimacy.

Now we see the root cause of it all — teens horny for platonic intimacy. And it cost the New York Times a week’s salary for Ross to present this pornography of oatmeal.


In praise of sitting quietly and listening thoughtfully to bad people

Even the liberal New York Times…

It’s commencement season, cellphones off please, no texts or tweets. Even with a hangover from debt, alcohol or regret, grads across the land may be lucky enough to hear something on the Big Day that actually stays with them.

Oh Timothy Egan we do love smarm.

This year, there’s the remarkable life story of the African-American scholar who grew up in the segregated South and rose to become secretary of state. Didn’t hear that one? Nobody did. Condoleezza Rice was scheduled to give the 248th anniversary commencement address at Rutgers University this coming Sunday. She canceled after a small knot of protesters pressured the university. It’s no contest who showed more class.

A psychopath who is here to stay and they call her…Condie. Slaughter a hundred thousand civilians and Timothy pegs you for Princess Grace. Complain about her presence to the people who just charged you a hundred grand for the ceremony and Timothy thinks you’re a brat. Well you’re all adults now so you have do whatever Mister Op-Ed says. Sit down shut up and listen thoughtfully to a few Tales From The Abattoir.

But if every speaker has to pass a test for benign mediocrity and politically correct sensitivity, commencement stages will be home to nothing but milquetoasts…

Give me a brisk, strong, witty defense of something I disagree with over a tired replay of platitudes. It matters little if the speaker is a convict or a seminarian, a statesman or a comedian.

If you’re going to bar war criminals from speaking at graduation it won’t be nearly as much fun. And then what sort of people will be left to give the address? Losers? Wimps? No thank you ma’am. Timothy would prefer to sit in the hot sun and listen to Ted Bundy offer a sparkling defense of serial homicide. Oh Yeah Bullshit. And if anyone isn’t already aware that Condoleezza is a lifelong coward, as if she might go to Rutgers to defend her corpse-riddled career, they’re nuts. Rather he’s nuts. And how shamefully easy it is to lose your Pulitzer Prize on the turnip truck.


‘Twas Perfesser Instapundit in the USA Today with the butthurt

Perfesser Emeritus of Dumbsplaining Glenn Reynolds stands at the USA Today lectern and readies himself, looking serious (turning his notes upside down, then downside up) before today’s lecture: The Media Hate Republicans.

He opens with a stab at rhetoric.

Why do organizations like CNN let Democrats’ arrested for felonies slip through the cracks?

The question sets the tone brilliantly. Isn’t the world a seesaw battle between Democrats and Republicans? And if CNN is not willing to be mean to one, aren’t they being mean to the other?

California State senator (and, until last week, candidate for secretary of state) Leland Yee was well-known as an anti-gun activist. Then, last week, he was indicted for, yes, conspiring to smuggle guns and rocket launchers between mobsters and terrorists in exchange for massive bribes…

This all sounds like news. You’ve got charges of huge bribes, rampant hypocrisy, illegal weapons and even a connection with foreign terrorists — and from a leading politician in an important state.

A ‘leading politician in an important state’ I probably would have heard about. But unless you live in Northern California, like me you’ve never heard a word about Leland Yee, the San Francisco politician who was arrested for shoplifting in 1992 and stopped for soliciting prostitutes in 1999. Gun-running sure as hell trumps those previous raps and he’s welcome to rot in jail.

But why isn’t CNN all over this story? A gun-hating Chinese Democrat from Pelositown exporting arms from the Philippines? If they’d only let the perfesser run their San Francisco bureau he’d have Nick Nolte and Eddie Murphy on this in a heartbeat.

CNN…didn’t report the story at all. When prodded by viewers, the network snarked that it doesn’t do state senators. Which is odd, because searching the name of my own state senator, Stacey Campfield, turns up a page of results, involving criticisms of him for saying something “extreme”. Meanwhile, CNN found time to bash Wisconsin state senator and supporter of Gov. Scott Walker, Randy Hopper over marital problems.

But there’s a difference. They’re Republicans. When Republicans do things that embarrass their party, the national media are happy to take note, even if they’re mere state senators.

Glenn doesn’t understand how ‘media’ work. Which is understandable since he believes all things originate from authority. CNN is failing in its role as Media Daddy, refusing to focus proper attention on Leland Yee and start a political wildfire. If the resulting scandal should burn down the White House, well that would be a fine example of balanced reporting.

But life is more complicated than that. There’s a second authority involved in the media complex: The audience. If they’re bored with a story, then they kill it. And it doesn’t matter how much indignation a perfesser manages, the controversy simply goes away.

In the case of Stacey Campfield, CNN were only taking their orders from the crowd. He’s a provocative asshole who posted an image of an “assault pressure cooker” to lob insults at gun control advocates while Boston Marathon bombing victims were still fighting to survive. The predictable and purposeful outrage landed him an interview on, yes, CNN. It shouldn’t surprise Glenn that CNN’s archives retain links going back to CNN’s interviews, but it does.

In the case of Hopper, CNN has a single four-paragraph blurb on him in Ed Hornick’s ‘Political Circus.’ And only then because Hopper was being recalled when his wife informed reporters he’d abandoned the family to live with his young mistress. Dear me the extent to which CNN will go to take down Republicans, it shocks you. But if you’re not yet full of astonishes, you can always try swallowing whatever argument Glenn cooks up next. In this dish, a turkey:

We’ve seen this before, of course: Washington Post reporter Sarah Kliff dismissed the horrific Kermit Gosnell trial as a “local crime story”, even as the press was going crazy covering another equally local crime story, the George Zimmerman trial.

Take in the warped panorama of Instapundit world, where Gosnell plays an ignoble Democrat and Zimmerman a good Republican. In George’s case, CNN had it in for the young conservative while the rest of the country couldn’t have cared less. But somebody left the TV on in the den, and then all sorts of people got angry, or at least said so, or feigned their outrage or something. And for no reason! If the media had pulled the same crap on Kermit Gosnell you’d have seen NBA players standing center court in support of the pro-life movement, sporting the same “Abort Obama” t-shirts the cool kids wear.


Because the Irish have a great friend, as you know, in Rupert Murdoch

Oh no. We Irish have hard feelings about something somewhere. If only a billionaire could come to our rescue.

Thuigim? No fays in our religious parade. Either that or we don’t drink Guinness, which is a small price to pay for me and my people because we don’t really care for its timeless raven warmth, like mother’s milk. We might also not sleep or sunburn casually or start fights about every useless thing on the planet.


George Will: I am a truck.

Just in:

The era of Gesture Liberalism is at hand.

Our remonstrations are annoying to George Will. We are thoroughly full of shit. Never before in all his 72 years have the hippies protested anything or held a demonstration.

It may be more amusing than consequential.

We could carve that on his tombstone. Burnish it in the peach fuzz on his ass. Alternatively this: “Caligula Wore a Bow Tie.”

Americans who exercise consumer sovereignty wherever Barack Obama still tolerates it are constantly disappointing him. For generations they persisted in buying what he calls “substandard” policies from what he calls “bad apple” health insurers. They stopped only when he forced them to stop — when he rescued them from their ignorance by banning their benighted preferences.

Last year all you could afford was a $10,000-deductible insurance policy. When you bought it, that was an expression of your “sovereignty.” Freedumb! This year, for the same price, a $1500-deductible policy became available. And this was your undoing, I take it. The second policy equals bad, somehow. Or is George Will a blockhead?

Have consumers thanked him for trying to wean them from their desire to drive large, useful, comfortable, safe vehicles that he thinks threaten their habitat, Earth?

Their habitat. Like we’re a bunch of zoo animals.

NOAA global temperature

Christ what an asshole.

The 2013 numbers tell the tale of their ingratitude. In 2013, for the 32nd consecutive year, the best-selling vehicle was Ford’s F-Series pickups.

That’s what your mom wants to drive, right? A truck. Perfect for commuting, Sunday drives and picnics. It’s summertime, and we’re going upstate with the dogs lashed down in the bed. Oops there goes Frisky.

But let us play George’s silly game, shall we? You Stoopid Hippies, The Market Is What Decides:

Even with SUV and crossover utility vehicles sales surging, the average fuel efficiency of new vehicles sold in August set a new high for the U.S., according to a new report…

“I am not surprised that overall fuel economy is improving,” says Sivak, who has been tracking fuel efficiency for the last six years. “Buyers are selecting more fuel-efficient vehicles within each class of vehicles.”

In case snotface can’t read:

fuel economy over the years

Fuel efficiency is a decades-long buying trend. A market behemoth. If you want to make a mint, offer the American consumer an economical car. Couldn’t be any clearer. And only a mothballed Ford F-150 would be considered a “comfortable, safe vehicle.” Friends, thinking about maybe getting your head torn off in an automobile accident? Well, then, you should think about getting yourself a CO2-brapping pile of steel:

Take a vehicle’s Insurance Institute for Highway Safety score, throw it into a data pot that includes Consumer Reports ratings, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration crash safety results and J.D. Power’s Initial Quality Study numbers, mix thoroughly, then pour out the most dangerous vehicle on the road today: The Ram pickup truck.

The website 24/7 Wall St. created this analysis to reveal the models with consistent quality problems and poor safety scores. All of the vehicles scored poorly in one area or another in crash testing, typically side or rear impact tests. They all scored badly in rollover testing, except the Jeep Wrangler.

In order, the best of the worst are:

1. Dodge Ram
2. Chevrolet Colorado Super Cab
3. Mazda CX-7
4. Mazda CX-9
5. Nissan Pathfinder
6. Jeep Wrangler
7. Suzuki SX4

Mobile coffins. A truck, a bigger truck, an SUV, a bigger SUV, a huge SUV, a Suzuki, and a Jeep. George Will is brilliant. If this isn’t the best of all possible worlds (it is not).

Liberals try to gag the pundit with their Hyundai Utopias, but he isn’t swallowing. American glory will not be satisfied with such sexless, academic petitions. The shrunken Prius, the flaccid Tesla. A clitoral Fiat. Hear him: NO! The trucking brute! Vrooom! Smelly and Manly! Overlarge, overpriced, to beat you at the gas pump and put you in the hospital. ‘Tis George Will! WISHING.


Benghazi! You can’t! You won’t! And you don’t stop!

The wingnuts are pissed at the New York Times.

Down the Times’ Bengahzi Rabbit Hole
Nitpicking over which jihadists did what lets the Obama administration evade the real questions.
By Andrew C. McCarthy | National Review | January 4, 2014

So Andrew McCarthy takes another crack at BENGHAZI!!1!! The Republican obsession is harder to kill than a vampire, although David Kirkpatrick’s in depth reporting comes close to driving the stake. Months of investigation in Benghazi revealed the violence came about spontaneously, as much a response to the Innocence of Muslims video as anything else. Dozens of young men from a number of militias participated in it. In short, it was a street riot, with armaments. But that sort of thing doesn’t really stoke the fear of mastermind Musselmen in America’s quaking hearts, does it? So McCarthy will do what he can to revive the menace of it all.

Of course, if it had happened in Chicago that would have been alright too. Andy would have called for better Stand Your Ground laws and the rollback of affirmative action. But since it all went down in Libya he’s got to work a different angle. Try a little something else. Anti-Americanism. Mass murder. Conspiracy. Jihad.

What was the commander-in-chief of the United States armed forces doing through the night of September 11, 2012, while he knew Americans were under jihadist siege in Libya?

Then he calls aloud: Hillary Clinton! And Vince Foster rolls over in his grave.

The Times report is a labor of love in the service of President Obama and, in particular, the Hillary Clinton 2016 campaign ramp-up. Former secretary of state Clinton, of course, was a key architect of Obama’s Libya policy.

Also Muslims. And terrorists.

She was also chiefly responsible for the protection of American personnel in that country, including our murdered ambassador, J. Christopher Stevens, and the three other Americans killed by Muslim terrorists…

It’s a horror film that sells itself. The only thing missing is the buttered popcorn. Well, a little popcorn and the slightest bit of anything that refutes Kirkpatrick’s reporting…

…why do I say, “Mission Accomplished”? Because the objective of Kirkpatrick’s novella is not to persuade; it is to shrink the parameters of newsworthy inquiry to a punctilious debate over nonsense: The cockamamie trailer and the dizzying jihadist org chart.

Cocklefish and bodskins! You’re screwing it up! I laughed so hard at this paragraph, then I stopped reading. I wonder why he didn’t just yell poopyhead.


Look what Lindsay is up to now

Well. What a surprise…

As he moves to introduce a bill in the Senate banning abortions after 20 weeks of pregnancy, Sen. Lindsey Graham said Sunday the issue is a conversation a “humane” society needs to have.

“This is a debate worthy of a great democracy. When do you become you? At 20 weeks of a pregnancy, what is the proper role of the government in protecting that child?” Graham said on “Fox News Sunday.”

I remember when something called ‘Lady Gaga’ suddenly started popping up on my internets. What is this? A person? A movie? Perhaps it’s a blasphemous art movement, like the Fauvists. ‘The Lady Gagas have just constructed a five story butter-sculpture of Jim Nabors in an airport atrium.’ Crazy.

Anyway I haven’t the faintest idea what “abortion” is so I’m off to educate myself. I’m sure this is exactly what Lindsay expects of me in anticipation of the Great Debate. Wikipedia maybe? The first of the historic discussions will start any second now but, first, apropos of nothing . .

Graham’s approval in his home state has dropped nearly 30 points among conservatives in a new Winthrop University poll. Among Republicans and GOP leaners, 45.2 percent approve of the job Graham is doing, down from 71.6 percent in February. His approval among all registered voters stands at 37.4 percent, with 48.5 percent disapproving.

. . it appears that Graham’s right-wing base is evaporating like witch hazel on a blazing iron. Conservatives normally being pathologically loyal, this would be a disaster. For whatever reasons, even his fellow right-wingers, the defiant amid the sane, have come to despise the old drama queen. If something doesn’t turn this trend around, look where his election day support will end up:

Right above zero. This would be among the most conservative people in South Carolina. Maybe he could find an issue to rouse the right-wingers and revive his fading chances. Graham has taken political solace previously in our many marches to war, but that drum has been beaten ragged. What about capital punishment? How about prayer in school? The old devil, I imagine he’ll find something.