Oscar note? Not really, I don’t care. The politics of Oscars? Nope. Dave Weigel said something that started a Balloon Juice thread? That’s it.

…Seth McFarlane’s “I Saw Your Boobs” song was a classic example of cloaked offensiveness—pretending that you are parodying sleaze when you’re just being sleazy.

Weigel’s overwrought. I find McFarlane lame, and I’m sure he was a far bigger prick at some other point in the night. But here’s the song:

“We saw your boobs
We saw your boobs
In the movie that we saw,
We saw your boobs”

Ta-daa, I typed it out. It’s not “I saw your boobs,” and it says nothing about sleaze, and it is not sleazy. It’s stump stupid. It made me laugh. But in case anyone hasn’t read enough into a ditty that was written by Butthead the show host, here’s the take home:

But on reflection, it was even bro-ier than I realized. In many of the movies in the song—Monster’s Ball, Monster, Boys Don’t Cry—the nudity appeared in the context of women being raped or murdered. Wakka wakka!

The context in real life? We did not catch a glimpse of Cheryl Araujo in some nightmarish video clip of a sexual assault. That would be an awful thing to make fun of. What we saw was an actress in a Hollywood production. The only reality was the movie-making.

Dave makes the same mistake most Americans make in equating the person with the characterization. These women actors are smart, they are professional, they are not confused and they didn’t get raped in front of the camera. They’re the ones who decided to take the risk, if one exists any more, to go topless for the purposes of the film. And there are always multiple purposes for a film.

And they earned the rewards. They are obsessed over and academy awarded and rich and powerful. On high holy Hollywood night, no one needs a bit of fun poked at it more thoroughly than the self-worshiping film making community does, even the female members. (aside: you want to be angry about something? come live in Hollywood for a couple years and watch teens literally prostitute themselves in a twisted quest for fame. they love this Oscar bullshit.) I mention all this as a former multi-year member of the former Screen Extras Guild. The celebrity ‘shocked’ reactions were pre-taped for the song anyway, so it was a big larf. Thread comment:

Wait, rape jokes aren’t funny? Why the fuck doesn’t someone tell us this stuff?

Okay you got McFarlane, he was riffing on rape. You’re clearly too hip for this town.

It’s been a bad weekend for the residents of Anaheim, California. It’s been a dangerous place to be, even for the women and children. Because the cops there are out of control.

Saturday afternoon, police confronted Manuel Angel Diaz of Santa Ana.

The officers chased Diaz and observed him throwing unidentified objects onto rooftops as he ran, Welter said. What led one of the officers to shoot Diaz remained under investigation Sunday, Welter said. . .

A 17-year-old who lives in the neighborhood said she saw the shooting from about 20 feet away. She said Diaz had his back to the officer and was shot in the buttocks area. Diaz went down on his knees, and she said he was struck by another bullet in the head. The other officer handcuffed Diaz, who by then was on the ground and not moving, she added. . .

Police reportedly tried to buy any video taken by witnesses on their cellphones, residents said.

[Chief of Police] Dunn said he didn’t know whether the allegations were true. He said it was unclear whether it’s against Anaheim Police Department policy to do so, but said that the agency would investigate.

I can’t believe the Chief isn’t aware of this, but buying witnesses’ cell phones is not legitimate police procedure. And running away is no capital crime. An angry crowd gathered around the scene where the killing took place. This is how the police reacted to the tense situation:

. . by firing bean bags and rubber bullets at woman and children, without warning. And attacking them with a police dog. Plenty of Anaheim’s citizens have been bruised and bloodied by their police department this weekend.

On Sunday, Elizabeth Aguilar, 19, displayed a welt on her upper right arm where she said she was hit by a bean bag fired by a police officer at close range.

Aguilar said that when the K-9 dog was released on demonstrators, she was struck by a bean bag after trying to hit the dog as it lunged toward a stroller with a baby inside.

Her father was struck three times by bean bags and had to seek treatment at a hospital, she said.

“I thought (the police) are supposed to warn us if they are about to do something like that to clear the crowd,” Aguilar said. “But they just started shooting at us.

“I used to look up to the police when I was a kid,” she added. “But now I have no respect.”

Now word arrives that the police shot and killed another man. This was yesterday, Sunday. The OC Weekly:

A source is telling OC Weekly five shots were heard as another man was shot by police and believed to be dead. A resident of the neighborhood off of Guinida neighborhood said the shooting happened off of Guinida Lane and Palm Drive. About 200 protesters are on the scene. . .

UPDATE, 2:08 A.M.: Family friends tell the Weekly that the man shot and killed by Anaheim police late Sunday night is Joel Acevedo of Anaheim.

And now this Joel is dead too. One report said he was handcuffed at the time, but that’s unconfirmed. We’ll get details later today. In the meantime, stay clear of Anaheim.

What makes conservatism special? In a sentence, this:

Barack Obama’s Bloodiest Scandal
by Katie Pavlich | News Editor, Townhall | April 15, 2012

Operation Fast and Furious is the deadliest and most sinister scandal in American history.

War is never a scandal. Vietnam and the War in Iraq are gymnastic expressions of military power and therefore, by definition, fine. Really they’re damned impressive if you’d like to know. Also they’re not bloody. That pertains to something other than what you think. It’s a thing that certain people do when its politically advantageous. Like innocent Mexicans, very suddenly. Now you know.

A scandal so big, it’s worse than Iran-Contra and makes Watergate look like a high school prank gone wrong.

Additionally: When the actual President does something bad, like when Nixon directs the government to destroy the Democratic Party’s chances in the 1972 election, attack his political enemies through the IRS, destroy his critics by stealing their psychiatric files, then launches a massive cover-up to avoid jail, that’s like a “high school prank.”

Look at today’s lectures on fair play, they are everywhere. Lucky me, I’ve been reading how Bill Maher and Rush Limbaugh are the same person. You follow these rants, and they go: “These two guys, they’re identical. Bill Maher is a hideous misogynist, and Rush Limbaugh is an entertainer — who, by the way, carries enough of God’s good grace to manage an apology when he’s made a mistake. See?”

Oh, yes. Simple as could be. Bill Maher called Sarah Palin nasty things, Rush Limbaugh called Sandra Fluke nasty things. Maher is evil, Rush is a victim. Fifty-fifty, even-steven, comme ci comme ca, wang-chung. When two different guys say roughly the same things, it’s a wash. By someone’s definition, the two statements communicate the exact same thing.

Let’s see if I’m at all following this. I remember May 1, 2003. George W. Bush stood aboard the USS Abraham Lincoln and said of the Iraq War, “Mission Accomplished.” At the exact same time, watching the spectacle on TV, I thought about Karl Rove’s hard-selling the war to Americans. I mumbled to myself: “Mission Accomplished.” It’s weird how everybody chose to criticize George, instead of me.

It’s some sort of mystery how the exact same things end up different. It’s unfair, really. For instance, Bill Maher is a foul-mouthed stand up comic. And yet, unlike Rush Limbaugh, he’s not the leader of the American conservative movement or the Republican Party. While people will listen to Bill for his opinions, there aren’t millions of people who hang upon his every word. No sizable chunk of America re-posts, re-quotes and dittoes his every syllable because they believe that Bill is always right. Somehow, nobody thinks that Bill Maher is always right.

Also, unfortunately, people of similar politics may differ with Bill Maher. Plenty of people have criticized Bill for his opinions. Thankfully, this isn’t the case with Rush. Even when — especially when – you’re a powerful Republican congressman or senator, if you criticize Limbaugh, you write your future obituary.

Congressman Phil Gingrey from Georgia, for instance, mistakenly said:

“I mean, it’s easy if you’re Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh or even sometimes Newt Gingrich to stand back and throw bricks. You don’t have to try to do what’s best for your people and your party.”

. . then had to beg for a phone line into Rush’s radio program, to say:

“I clearly ended up putting my foot in my mouth on some of those comments and I just wanted to tell you, Rush, … that I regret those stupid comments.”

Whew. Representative Todd Tihart of Kansas once mis-stated:

“No, no, he’s just an entertainer.”

. . then had to trot out his spokesman to correct his near-fatal mistake:

“The congressman believes Rush is a great leader of the conservative movement in America . . “

Even the pretend leader of the Republicans, GOP Chairman Michael Steele, nearly bought the farm:

“Rush Limbaugh, his whole thing is entertainment. Yes, it’s incendiary. Yes, it’s ugly.”

. . until he genuflected, with humility:

“I have enormous respect for Rush Limbaugh… I was maybe a little bit inarticulate. … There was no attempt on my part to diminish his voice or his leadership…. I went back at that tape and I realized words that I said weren’t what I was thinking.”

It’s a shame no one’s had to apologize to Bill, the comic, to prevent his professional standing and political power from being destroyed. I doubt Maher would be interested in such games, anyway, to his discredit.

And it’s particularly sad that no one thinks Bill Maher is a figure worth deifying. Though he’s practically Rush’s twin, nobody has nominated him for a Nobel Peace Prize. No man, or university, or foundation, has ever written an equivalent to this on his behalf, a letter to the Chairman of the Norwegian Nobel Institute:

Dear Dr. Mjos:

Landmark Legal Foundation herewith submits the name of Rush Limbaugh as an unsolicited nomination for the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize.

We are offering this nomination for Mr. Limbaugh’s nearly two decades
of tireless efforts to promote liberty, equality and opportunity for all
mankind, regardless of race, creed, economic stratum or national origin. We fervently believe that these are the only real cornerstones of just and lasting peace throughout the world.

This says something about us, doesn’t it? The comedian will somehow never win a Nobel Peace Prize. This is shocking. It’s as if these two men, Bill Maher and Rush Limbaugh, had nothing in common at all.

As far as right-wing opinon-ers go, Wall Street Journal’s James Taranto is not the worst. He’s as overboard as anyone else is, but at least his stuff is written in a manner that’s easy on the brain. And he’s occasionally funny. So if you’re stuck, like me, reading these people, you know he’s not going to give you a headache.

Until today, when he weighed in on the Komen fiasco. This is pathetic:

Big Sister Is Watching You
Totalitarian feminism and the smearing of Susan G. Komen.
By James Taranto | Opinion | February 3 2012

Look at how we’ve imprisoned and tortured the poor Komen Foundation.

In breaking ties with Planned Parenthood, Komen made the same mistake: It failed to understand it was dealing with intolerant fanatics. Planned Parenthood’s attitude toward abortion opponents is not unlike that of Egyptian officials in the old regime toward Israelis.

When we’re not scouring the Sinai looking for pro-lifers to shoot, we’re putting the electrodes to anyone who’s circumcised. I’ve read enough: It’s time to pull the head off of James Taranto. Per usual, we’ll make him miserable first, perhaps by reading aloud editorials where he reminded us we’re given to hysteria.

The episode is reminiscent of George Orwell far more than Joe McCarthy. Komen’s actual aim was to extricate itself from the divisive national battle over abortion by severing its connection with a leading combatant.

There’s Planned Parenthood again, all hot-faced and fist-swinging in the national debate. I think Taranto actually believes this. I want a pound of whatever he’s smoking.

Yes, Planned Parenthood does abortions as a small part of its being the “nation’s leading sexual and reproductive health care provider.” No, it’s not a screaming partisan hack. Nor a keyboard-banging partisan hack writer. It just provides health services. Because 3% of this is abortion, James thinks that qualifies them as the hippie’s bug-eyed Bachmann. Grow a brain, pal.

And employing George Orwell for this? Photograph and all? Yes, isn’t liberal America a totalitarian government? Put your head in my cage of rats, Jim. You are the dead, buddy.

Totalitarianism politicizes everything, so that neutrality is betrayal–in this case, neutrality on abortion is portrayed as opposition to “women’s health.” As we wrote last year, this is also why purportedly pro-choice feminists can hate Sarah Palin and her daughter for choosing not to abort their children.

Oh, this sounds entirely plausible. Given the tenor of the piece so far, you wouldn’t expect James to back up his hallucinations with facts. But there is a link. So you click it, expecting to see the welcome page of “The Feminist Majority For Feeding Christians To The Abortion Machine”, but instead you get an opinion piece. Of his. Wherein, this:

Recently we were at a party where a woman in her 60s, a self-described feminist, called Palin a “moron” for having encouraged her daughter to carry her child to term and “to marry the sperm donor.”

Wow. Gaze upon the official gathering of America’s feminists. At some party.

Even apart from the gross language, this was a completely irrational thing to say.

Say what? How could that be? It’s the official political position of leftist women! Here they come, Jimmy. Pap Smear! Oogie Boogie!

JUST IN: Karen Handel, enemy of Planned Parenthood and political strategist behind the de-funding/bureaucratic purge, has resigned. Good riddance.

Megan McArdle focuses her powers of observation upon the Susan G. Komen Foundation’s de-funding of Planned Parenthood. Brace yourselves.

“Foundations are free-market entities, too, folks. They shouldn’t have to do things they don’t want to do. All in all, I’d say it’s a matter of free will.” I’m just guessing here.

Why Did Susan G. Komen Pull the Plug on Planned Parenthood?
Megan McArdle | The Atlantic

. . Though I’m pro-choice, I don’t share the outrage that was roiling my Twitter feed this morning. It is, as Josh Barro noted, absurd to pretend that abortion is somehow incidental to Planned Parenthood’s services, and since money is fungible, giving them money is probably helping to fund abortion provision.

Institutions set up firewalls, split accounts and spin-off divisions for senseless reasons. Money is fungible, dude. That’s what makes running a charity so easy, maybe the easiest thing to do on the planet. Blogging’s probably a close second. Or first, because numbers and opinions can be swapped about a bit, and you might make a note of that.

Since I think this is a very tough issue on which reasonable people can disagree, I can see why the federal government, and private foundations, would decline to fund their operations.

There it is. Quintessential McMegan thunder: I think that people make decisions. And the more I consider it, the more confident I am that freedom of choice is fine. I hope you all can understand my point. I’ll leave you to talk amongst yourselves . .

Nor do I think that this is somehow fatal–indeed, the news of the Komen foundation’s funding withdrawal was met by an outpouring of donations that, as of this writing, has nearly replaced the lost funds.

Have there really been any consequences? No. And that’s my point. The Komen Foundation wanted to hurt Planned Parenthood, but they probably haven’t, maybe. And frankly, this, friends, would be a good time for me to leave . .

And I don’t think that’s an accident. If Planned Parenthood didn’t provide abortions–if it had decided, post-Roe, to continue doing all the contraception provision and pelvic exams, but to stay out of the abortion side of the business–many of the people who now send them large checks probably wouldn’t bother.

Hey — are you feeling lost? I am. With everybody feeling so pissed, pretty much any old take would be a no-brainer. But no matter what I type, here I am at the beginning. Weird.

I’d guess that a considerable portion of their donor base is making an expressive commitment to abortion rights, but of course, the flip side of that is people who make an expressive decision not to give them money.

*ahem* . . which, obviously, is central to all my points. It doesn’t matter what we do. Discuss.

CNN contributor and conservative radio host Dana Loesch said on her show that she not only thinks the Marines who urinated on dead Taliban soldiers are cool, but she’d be willing to join them.

After playing a news clip describing the video, Loesch said, “I’d drop trou and do it too. That’s me, though. I want a million cool points for these guys.”

Dana Loesch: The Golden Pundit. Can we get a million kewl points for theze guys? OK. Here ya go, cha-ching for you and you and you and you. What now, d00d? Buy some t-shirts that say ‘Wetcha? You betcha.’ Epic. War, the fraternity party. I’m guessing 10% of the Beta Meta Meathead population would gladly put on some Taliban fatigues this weekend and play dead in whatever town Dana’s in.

She wondered why there was any kind of scandal surrounding the incident.

“C’mon people, this is a war,” she said. “Do I have a problem with that as a citizen of the United States? No, I don’t.”

I know virtually nothing about being a military man or fighting in a war. But I know enough to know that pissing on people you shoot, taking video of it and passing it around can get Americans killed. I know soldiers know it’s illegal. And I know better than to hoot it up over something that the military works hard to prevent.

Dana Loesch isn’t just a strutting bimbo. She’s working against the armed forces, their honor and traditions. When it comes to prosecuting a war, I assume they know better than she does.

KABUL — An Afghan soldier who shot dead four French troops has said he did it because of a recent video showing US Marines urinating on the dead bodies of Taliban insurgents, security sources told AFP.

The attack on the soldiers, who were unarmed, came on Friday at a base in eastern Afghanistan and left 15 other French troops wounded, eight of them seriously . .

The report was backed by an intelligence source and another with access to information from the Afghan ministry of defence, both of whom requested anonymity.

“In his initial confessions, he said that he was strongly motivated to kill the soldiers when he saw the video of foreign soldiers urinating on Afghan corpses,” the intelligence source said.

Let me guess, Dana. Now you’re going to be angry.

Hark! Nanook of Tiara Borealis Klondike Parkaboobs:

“I want to see this thing continue because iron sharpens iron, steel sharpens steel,’’ Ms. Palin said . . “These guys are getting better in their debates, they’re getting more concise, they’re getting more grounded . .’’

. . they’re getting more deflected, denatured and disintegrated by the multi-thousand BTU Chinese forge of Republican politics. There are barely months to settle on a wingnut, but who will conquer tomorrow? Everybody has to know. Hail heavy metal Freedonia.

Newton’s latest strategy has been to eliminate anyone in sight still breathing. So he’s been taking it to the dead-white and blue capitalist, Chet Bainbot. He’s been taking it to the black children, destined to do no work. He’s been taking it to the gritty streets of South Carolina, where folks still (sshhh) prefer ‘others’ step off the sidewalk as they approach.

And whaddyaknow. It’s working:

Rasmussen Poll: Gingrich closes gap with Romney nationally
The State Column

Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich’s relentless attacks against rival candidate Mitt Romney appear to be working, as a Rasmussen Reports poll released Wednesday indicates he is just three percentage points behind Mr. Romney nationwide. The poll finished with Mr. Romney garnering 30 percent of the votes, while Mr. Gingrich finished at 27 percent.

Now, that’s a Rasmussen poll. Meaning the numbers look spectacular and are surely wrong. But Newthor is definitely closing the gap. His campaign got so excited after Monday’s debate they put together this clip:

For context, let’s add . . uh, context. The get-up-and-stomp-your-jackboots ovation for Newtran (dubbed “The Moment” by his humble campaign) came as a result of moderator Juan Williams pressing Gingrich on his “black people” rhetoric. As in, “black people drive like this,” and “black people yell at movies,” and “I hate black people too.” Right-wing Newsmax reported the reverse-lynching this way:

Gingrich Slams Juan Williams in Racial Exchange
Maxi-News | ‘White Lady Fresh’

. . “Can’t you see this is viewed, at a minimum, as insulting to all Americans, but as particularly to black Americans?” Williams said.

“No, I don’t see that,” Gingrich answered, prompting cheers and applause from the audience. He also recalled the fact that his own daughter Jackie did janitorial work for her first job.

“Only the elites despise earning money,” he said.

DUDE! That’s what you get for being racist, Juaaan. Or Hwaaaan. Maybe I putee fyou bettah unnastann: chingchong linglong, bitch. Winning.

Meanwhile, demonstrating a steely capacity for institutional-thuggery, someone in the Romney campaign directed ABC to talk to Marianne Gingrich, Newtrul’s second wife. This is the only thing anyone in the solar system is talking about tonight. It’s the end of everything, politics-wise, forever. Plus it has consequences. Given Newchan’s self-centered approach to affection (he loves his prostate, where he lives in a Spanish Mediterranean jizzball), the interview tomorrow will be devastating. If there’s an audience or a god, he will be dead by Friday.

Not to be outdone: someone else. Next: Rick Santorum. He’s piggybacking the anti-Gingrich campaign. He’d like to point out the difference between himself and the in flagrante davenportia Georgian:

Former Pennsylvania senator Rick Santorum told a Spartanburg crowd Wednesday that the only woman he’s ever sat on a couch with is his wife, a not-so-subtle dig at former House speaker Newt Gingrich, who appeared seated next to Democrat Nancy Pelosi in a 2008 ad urging action on climate change.

Whoa.

in 2010, you quietly left your wife and kids for another woman. In 2011, you were a Senate supporter of Governor Walker’s efforts to attack workers and disenfranchise labor unions. In March, when it was discovered your live-in girlfriend, Valerie Cass, was a woman barely out of college and barely half your age, you hid from the press. When it became public she was a right-wing lobbyist who wangled a cushy job with your buddy’s administration, you hid from the press.

When the petitions for your recall were being circulated, you hid from the press. When your wife and housekeeper said they would gladly sign them, you hid from the press. When your polls were tanking, you hid from the press. When you lost the recall, you hid from the press.

3 months later — finally – someone spotted you:

At 5:30 p.m. Sunday, a citizen dialed 911 to report a black Suburban “all over the road” on Highway 151 near County Trunk WH in Peebles, said Chief Deputy Mark Strand . .

“We were able to get a deputy in the area. The vehicle (Hopper’s) got called in about a mile from Highway 23” . .

There was one passenger in the car, Valerie Cass, 26, of Fond du Lac, according to dispatch logs . .

Hopper refused to take a preliminary breath test when he was stopped by officers, Strand said. He was put through field sobriety tests. He failed those tests, he said.

Peek-a-boo, we see you.

I’m not a conspiracy guy, I’m not out to get Ron Paul. I might not care for his politics, but he’s likely the most benign monster lurking in the Republican closet. So I’m less motivated to attack him than probably 50 other right-wing assholes.

But, as for controversies, I’m in on this one: Ron Paul wears eyebrow toupees. Really. He carries an unhealthy narcissism relative to his supra-orbital hair, and attends to it by pasting ‘brow falsies.

What? Where the hell did this ‘news’ come from? From a handful of people who noticed a strange thing about the 75 year-old in Tuesday night’s Dartmouth debate. It took a couple of days, but somebody dug up the quizzical pic. The image is running wild across the internet:

That is . . uh . . hmm. It looks to be a brow wig. With a normal human brow loitering in its proper place, underneath. I had no idea such toupees had cause to exist, but apparently they do (vanity, thy name is Pete Gallagher). Hard to explain that image absent photoshopping or some hirsute lens flare. Credit Paul’s intrepid staff, they did try:

Jesse Benton, a campaign spokesman, insisted that Mr. Paul had been the victim of the elements, namely a heavy pollen season in New Hampshire, and called accusations that he’d been artificially enhancing “stupid” and “insulting.”

“Dr. Paul’s allergies acted up a touch,” Mr. Benton said . .

Yes, when you get allergies, your eyelashes crawl in your ears. Sure.

Anyway, I thought it all preposterous. He has weird eyebrows — who cares? I went on to the ‘image’ Google, and I looked and I checked. And nothing jumped out. Yeah, it was odd that his eyebrows got darker with age. It was strange that his eye hair progressed to perfectly monochrome and linear over the decades. But what do I know of these things? Andy Rooney’s eyebrows were a riot. A white riot, but they’re a fungible, mystifying chaos.

And then I came across this pic from a February 2010 article in the New Mexico Independent. Now, I’m convinced:

I’m amazed by this. Eyebrows, of all things.

He’s just yer regular, old, salt-of-the-Earth Wisconsinite. Stabbing his middle class neighbors in the throat. Bailing on his wife to go live with his 25 year-old hottie, with her posh right-wing lobbying job and lingering, cosmopolitan baby fat:

WI Repub lives outside district with mistress, says wife
By David Ferguson | Sunday, March 13th, 2011 | RawStory

Protesters who marched at the home of Wisconsin state senator Randy Hopper (R-Fond du Lac) were met with something of a surprise on Saturday. Mrs. Hopper appeared at the door and informed them that Sen. Hopper was no longer in residence at this address, but now lives in Madison, WI with his 25-year-old mistress.

Woah. They were just looking to recall the sonuvabitch for being a Walker-esque, union-busting jerk? And the wife dropped dime on Mr. Family Values? Excellent.

Blogging Blue reports that the conservative Republican’s much-younger new flame is currently employed as a lobbyist for right-wing advocacy group Persuasion Partners, Inc., but was previously a state senate staffer who worked on the Senate Economic Development Committee alongside Mr. Hopper. Her bio has been scrubbed from the Persuasion Partners’ website, but a screen-grab is available here.

Here’s Sen. Douche:

Could be his two kids there, probably is. Not really sure, though. His biography is suspiciously difficult to pin down. His life story (certainly his wife’s story) has gotten a recent scrubbing by staffers and friends.

“Citing recent threats during the budget repair bill battle, Republican Senator Randy Hopper says he will not participate in Saturday’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade in Fond du Lac,” reports WBAY TV. “In a written statement, Senator Hopper said, ‘I had looked forward to walking the parade route and sharing this celebration with my family, friends, neighbors, and constituents, but I, in no way, want to put the citizens of Fond du Lac in harm’s way.’”

Oh Lord no. Not Randy Hopper, no sir. He really cares about others. He wonders how they’re doing. Hey there, buddy — how you been?

Got a strabismus and a wicked case of dry eye. Still — all smiles, Senator!

And you, baby — how you doing?

Aw, you know how I’m doing. Come home.

Note: My original post included an image of a woman who appeared to be Valerie Cass but was not. I offer my apologies to the mis-identified Valerie.

G-d d-mn-d university students. With their f-m-le j-zz:

The $50,000 Orgasm
Dennis Prager | Mar 7, 2011 | Townhall.com

On Feb. 21, the 600 Northwestern University students enrolled in the popular Human Sexuality course taught by professor John Michael Bailey were told that if they wished to stay after class — it was clearly made optional — they would see a live demonstration of female ejaculation, the subject of that day’s class. A naked young woman (not a student) would demonstrate a “f—saw” and come to orgasm in front of the students. About 120 students stayed.

I don’t need to tell you this post will not go well.

But first, here are excerpts from the longer statement released by Bailey on March 1, after the story had begun to be national news:

“On the afternoon of February 21st Ken MB and colleagues arrived while I was finishing my lecture, on sexual arousal. I was talking about the female g-spot and the phenomenon of female ejaculation, both of which are scientifically controversial.”

This post will go very, very badly. Prager’s ‘sarcasm’:

. . since we are only animals, why shouldn’t students have a woman come to orgasm in front of a hundred students? Except for the possible titillation, the exhibition is no different than watching a female baboon having sex..

Told you. Female orgasms. Like a baboon.

By Northwestern’s logic, a biology class studying the excretory system would watch a man or woman relieve themselves in front of a hundred students. I cannot think of a single argument the man-is-an-animal crowd could offer against it.

Ball-twaddle! These pagan eggheads, wielding of surgical scissors and microscopy, they should be allowed to butcher the bellies of our sacred vessels, passed on as we might be? Who are they to fiddle-finger in the mysterious viscera of God’s inscrutable human-ism? Who would presume to tell us what a “liver” is? Where it may lie? Pray, what are we — the Great Hyena’s meat bags?

It’s a college lecture-lab on “Human Sexuality.” Great effort, Dennis, using logic to equate a woman’s orgasm with shitting.