Raw Story tells us that Herman Cain is about to domi9ate internet TV:

Failed Republican presidential candidate and former pizza CEO Herman Cain is planning to launch his own Internet TV channel called “CainTV” that, oddly, features patriotic dinosaurs and a cartoon version of President Ronald Reagan, among other bizarre attractions.

“Whether you are looking for commentary, comedy, or culture, CainTV delivers it all in an Informed, Inspirational, and INtertaining way . . ”

What Raw Story failed to add was “Do not watch this stuff in a fragile state of mind.” It’s too bizarre to make sense of. Why is Sandra Fluke mouthing some fat guy’s words? Who is the homeless guy? Why is there a baby T. Rex? Who is this man doing the Ol’ Jim Crow? Why does Herman want me to buy guns for sheep? My head. I tried to whittle this blotter of Velvet Spidermans down to a tolerable minute, but I think I made it worse.

Remember Karen Klein? The 68 year-old grandmother of eight who was taunted by some nasty Greece, New York, seventh grade bus weasels and made to cry? After video of the harassment went viral, kind and decent people across America decided to raise a little money for Karen so she could take a much-needed vacation. The donations are now up to something like $700,000, so the story has a nice ending.

By the way, you didn’t think she’d get away with it, did you? Not without somebody pointing out something disastrously liberal about the whole thing:

Bullied ‘jail bus’ lady: Fearful fatty, not a hero
Ilana Mercer asserts Karen Klein is perpetuating infantilism in America.

The new “poster child” for a bully victim in America is, wait for it, not a helpless small child, robbed of lunch money by the schoolyard ruffian, but an adult entrusted with supervising them . .

To the sight of a feeble adult who occupies two seats on the vehicle she’s supposed to supervise, too fat to budge and too powerless to perform the task for which she is being paid – the Internet erupted in cheers.

That’s something I don’t recall. I don’t remember anyone leaping to their feet and shouting themselves horse after watching those ten painful minutes. Is this necessary, Ilana? Do you really have to take Gramma down a big peg?

Nevertheless, Klein’s coffers filled up fast. She is now $650,000 richer and plans to make a pilgrimage to the Mecca of maturity: Disneyland.

The trip appears to be mediated by Anderson Cooper, CNN’s Alpha female.

Take that, Pamela. Who is this Mercer? The activist for raw strength and vigor in the Great American Bus Monitor? She’s a World Net Daily regular. A former South African who is famous for criticizing her birth country for — big surprise — its apartheid-free cultural depravity and criminality. She wrote a book called (no kidding!) “Into the Cannibal’s Pot: Lessons for America from Post-Aparthied South Africa.” You might be interested in who is a fan of Mercer.

“In both nations the founding European stock yielded up their dominance in the interests of justice and liberty. Instead of moving to equal citizenship under fair laws, however, both nations – in different style and measure but with similarly dire results – have embraced official tribalism (`multiculturalism’) and state-enforced racial favoritism (`affirmative action’). For South Africa the transformation has been fatal – brutally so for victims of the nation’s swelling social disorder, as Ms. Mercer documents in heartbreaking detail. For the U.S.A. it is not too late to change course.”

John Derbyshire might be harder to find now that he’s been excommunicated from the National Review, but his words are still around. Not that they’re any different now. Everything’s still the same. Then there’s this guy:

“Into the cannibal’s Pot is brilliant, exceeding all my expectations. It is very courageous of Ilana Mercer also to attack the whole notion of ‘democracy.’ This is a much-needed shot at a holy cow.”

That would be “Afrikans activist” (*cough*) Dan Roodt. Don’t call him a racist, or he’ll sue you. But do feel free to read his blog:

But just like two individuals may differ in both attitude and ability, it is certainly admissable that races, too, may differ not only in attitude but also in ability. How much of the one can be explained by the other? After all, if I am a bad golfer and I find the game frustrating, I am more likely to give it up than pursue and practise it until I become a low handicapper.

What goes for golf, goes for maths and science, as well as school or university in general. Since The Bell Curve, not to mention may [sic] scientific studies published in peer-review journals, we all know that blacks have a lower average IQ than whites. In South Africa, the white IQ is somewhere around 100 whereas the average black IQ is about 70.

Blacks generally prefer parties and festivals because a lot of them lack the mental ability to excel at such demanding subjects as mathematics and natural science which require logical reasoning and cognitive ability.

We need more South Africans disappointed with the dismantling of apartheid to lecture us about the degenerating moral fabric of America. You might guess they’d be unhappy with the lack of an overriding unitary authority. You might guess they’d be a little disappointed with us since we let the you-know-whos have the run of the place.

Rightblog Weasel Zippers, home of the raging deleted post, is having a good ol’ Muslim-bashing time right now. They’re always having a good old Muslim-bashing time, come to think of it.

But right now they’re crazy-raged at the Council on American-Islamic Relations. As if that could be fresh and sassy, you bet. I should get on with it:

WHAT?! They told our Mooslim executioners not to use pictures of women for target practice? THE SAND NIGGERS WANT US TO BE FAGGOTS! Like that. See?

Maybe the SEALS should use the CAIR offices as their training range. They are after all, the enemy.

…

Time for some live targets, courtesy of cair.

…

OK CAIR,We will push for a goat holding a weapon…

that should turn you on…

…

P.S. Please go home, fuck your goat, and shut the fuck up.

…

LOL…they’de be REALLY pissed to see my range….full-sized mo-ham-head…mo-ham-head….and mo’ mo-ham-head…3 different scenarios at 3 different ranges (30, 45 and 55 feet) but the end results are always the same before I’m done, for some odd reason all the lil’ mo-ham-heads have great big fucking holes in their foreheads!!!

…

FUCK YOU CAIR and the camel you rode in on.

…

Muzz scrunts can be rabid jihadis.
Blow her head off.

…

SWEET! I want to go shot there!

…

… muzzies have such tiny dicks its a wonder they even have a population to kill or that their women would want to kill themselves…it must get tiring as hell to have to please yourself night after night while their husbands are out raping goats, camels and little boys, huh???

…

I think they should cut the ears or the nose off so she would look normal.

…

Question – How can you shoot women and children?

Answer – Aim lower and don’t lead by as much.

…

They intend (with China being in the lead, and they’ll take over somewhere) to subvert totally.

Ya. How come our SEALs are now as if on-display? Their business is none of our business!

…

While CAIR is part of the problem, the real problem is the PC Navy staff officers, commanding officers and Pentagon civilian staff that listen to these turds. Same in all the services.

Romney needs to can every one of them and put the nation on a war footing against mooslim violence.

Bring back the Crusades. Death to the infidels.

…

The reality of the enemy is slowly becoming our own. CAIR is nothing but a tribe of rapists, robbers and retards.

CAIR= COLLECTION of ASSES IDIOTS and RETARDS

…

Or perhaps the Department of Homeland Security can give the SEALS some active shooter training….you know, if you see a person witha gun doing bad things, run away and hide. John Wayne must be spinning in his grave like a top!

…

CAIR fuck off–’ We Americans are offended using real AMERICAN LIVES FOR TARGET PRACTICE ”’ suck allahs sausage dry

…

muzzies are 2nd stage dog sh-t

…

Should the SEALS start using hoodies and skittles as targets?

…

As far as I can tell, there are about a billion muzzies left in the world that we haven’t killed yet. And that’s a billion too many. Load up, everyone.

That’s right! Go get your gun and shoot a billion people. America! @#$%&!

After a routinely-fired shitnozzle launched a lucrative enterprise by provoking an unarmed Negro to kick his Pillsbury ass, shooting the teen point blank and then jacking internet dollars from fantasy teamers too cowardly to do the same, a post-modern legal quandary did arise.

How should a stodgy justice system dictate to web entrepreneurs? A man with a vision and a business model is hardly a criminal. He’s just a job creator. And knowing full-well the online sympathy market for nigger-shooters is hardly a reason to arrest him. These people, alive and dead, pose no threat to polite society. So what does it matter how the Zimmermans run their business? There’s no compelling interest for courts to bother with a company’s liquidity.

Prosecutors say the Zimmermans used a rudimentary “code” to discuss the money in recorded jailhouse phone calls — referring to $100,000, for example, as “$100.” At least two of the calls, the state alleges, were made while Shellie Zimmerman and her husband’s sister were at a local credit union making the transactions.

Zimmerman told his wife to “pay off all the bills” with the money, prosecutors said, including an American Express card and a Sam’s Club card. He also instructed her on how to pay his bail.

According to the affidavit, after her husband was released on bond days after the hearing, she transferred more than $85,000 back into his account.

Shellie was supposed to tell them about George’s hundreds of thousands worth of racist donations, but she lied. Understandably, freedom. So they arrested her for perjury. For a time, the Bill Gates and Paul Allen of hip-hop mud-duck target shooting for-reals LLC, a spontaneous venture, were imprisoned yards from each other. The exercise quad and the stoolies pen, to name but two.

This president is so cool, he can’t help it. It’s just his nature. Speaking at a fundraiser not too far from here, he told an LGBT-friendly crowd: “My wife won’t suck my penis.” And the crowd erupted in both friendly and derisive laughter because that’s not their problem. Right? Oh Mr. President, you silly Commander Guy with your lonely saliva-free dong. You is lovable, in your lame hip-hop way like the Fresh Prince.

The quote came when Obama spoke of the first lady’s appearance on Ellen Degeneres’ show. Click for audio. (click)

I want to thank my wonderful friend who accepts a little bit of teasing about Michelle beating her in pushups — but I think she claims Michelle didn’t go all the way down. That’s what I heard. I just want to set the record straight — Michelle outdoes me in pushups as well. So she shouldn’t feel bad. She’s an extraordinary talent and she’s just a dear, dear friend — Ellen DeGeneres. Give Ellen a big round of applause.

And err whoops. I screwed it up. I see the joke was actually: “Ellen Degeneres said my wife won’t suck anyone’s penis.” Or: “Ellen Degeneres said my wife won’t suck her studio carpet’s penis.” Whatevs, my wife won’t put it in her mouth, and that’s the joke the President was trying to make. In order to win over the intransigent Hollywood insider CoJo/Ross the Intern constituency.

Did the Greatest Orator in the History of the Republic Make a Crude Sexual Joke About His Wife?
Sundries Shack | Jimmie

President Obama gave a speech Wednesday, a part of which genuinely boggled my mind. Now, I know you’re probably thinking I’ll quote a stirring bit of admiration of the heroes who stormed the beaches of Normandy so many years ago. After all, Wednesday was the anniversary of the Day of Days. But no. . .

Today’s mind-boggling moment cane [sic] during a speech at a fundraiser before an LGBT audience. . . in the midst of his remarks, he dropped one of the more inappropriate comments I’ve seen from a President since, well, the last Democrat we had in office. This is from the official pool report, as quoted by Todd Starnes of Fox News Radio.

“Michelle outdoes me in pushups as well,” he said, after saying that she’s taken some criticism on her technique “because she doesn’t go all the way down” – a line that he let hang, naughtily provoking laughter from the crowd.

Well, that ain’t the transcript, is it? Yeah, so? Who cares.

Did President Obama Just Make A Blowjob Joke?
So says the pool report from his gay and lesbian fundraiser at L.A.’s Beverly Wilshire tonight.
Incredibly awkward.

Buzzfeed, that. Dan Riehl:

Obama: Michelle “Doesn’t Go All The Way Down”

I’m thinking Barry didn’t want to go there at a gay and lesbian fund raising event. But he di-d!!

Then Dan gets the transcript.

Update: It Was A Gay Joke – Obama: Michelle “Doesn’t Go All The Way Down”

Update: Buzzfeed has added the transcript. Given that it was related to Ellen DeGeneres, the context becomes a bit more clear – or, less fuzzy, perhaps.

The joke was gay. Get it? I don’t. I’m thinking homo sex is all quantum mechanical to Dan. Good guess, pal. This was iOwnTheWorld’s take:

They’re having difficulty interpreting the President’s humor. Imagine trying to have sex with these people. Betsy’s Page:

Classy, President Obama, classy.

Ann Althouse plays the silly game Limbaugh made famous. You’re smart enough to know the truth, but you need the adulation and play both sides:

. . consider that Obama has a bone to pick — does that sound dirty to you? — with Bill Clinton right now, and given the strong association between Bill Clinton and blowjobs and the suspicion that Obama is currently pissed at Bill Clinton, he may have been engaging in some subtle jousting with Bill Clinton — does that sound dirty to you? —about the sexual proclivities of their respective wives.

So she puts up a ‘poll’ — “does that sound dirty to you?” (jeezus). And “Yes. Completely intentional, with a touch of deniability written in.” is winning handily.

Well here it is. The actual clip, where you see what happened:

Second post in a row. Back in 1991, the President’s old (current?) literary agency put out a bio of him in a booklet meant for industry perusal.

Barack Obama, the first African-American president of the Harvard Law Review, was born in Kenya and raised in Indonesia and Hawaii.

Miriam Goderich, now a partner at the agency, waters the fire:

This was nothing more than a fact checking error by me — an agency assistant at the time. There was never any information given to us by Obama in any of his correspondence or other communications suggesting in any way that he was born in Kenya and not Hawaii. I hope you can communicate to your readers that this was a simple mistake and nothing more.

Fuck off, Miriam. People know the propaganda of a tyrant when they see it. Hear it. Roger Simon, the very veteran scribe too dumb for me to do him justice (I’ll try), leads the charge up Obama’s anthill. After first somehow anticipating the bombshell, he asked “Is Obama Imploding?” Standing in the crater, he asked “Is Obama a Pathological Liar?” Now, calmed down, Roger ponders the meaning:

The Mystery of the Kenyan Birth
by Roger L Simon

Reading the extraordinary revelation about Barack Obama’s youthful literary career on Breitbart.com — that his agents published a promotional book in 1991 with a bio of Obama saying he was born in Kenya — set my old mystery writer mind ablaze.

How could that be? Why would they think such a thing?

Why would they think such a thing? Let’s see: He’s black, Kenyan by descent, and people call him “Barack Obama.” Is that good enough for you, Agatha?

There are only two forks in this road — either he was born in Kenya or he wasn’t.

Out for waffles, Roger stuffs the IHOP flatware in his $.99 socks. That’s how I figure the non sequitur. Bob Frost, we have come to a single metaphor in our road: should we go by the ‘wingnut’ or by the ‘regular person’? We take the stupid:

I have never been a conspiracy theorist and will assume the latter, although I have to confess that for the first time, given this revelation, I have the tiniest soupçon of doubt.

Nevertheless, the more interesting, and actually frightening and depressing, conclusion is the former. So what if he was born in Kenya? At least we know why he lied about it. He wanted to be president.

Naw, it’s silly. But it could be true but I’m not that sort of guy but now I’m thinking just maybe. Because if it were true that would be interesting and then everything would make seamless sense and then he’s been lying all this time, because he wanted to be president, which now just occurs, to me. Giddy-up. This humble blogger did write that the tenor of right-coverage on the “Kenya report” stunk of nirvana. Let’s see:

But why did Obama’s agents think he was born in Kenya? That’s a more interesting question. (Obama, of course, is a liar either way.)

Roger has got the bastard.

I will leave aside for the moment the question of whether he vetted the agent’s material himself . .

. . because that would crash an orgasm, but there’s conclusive evidence in the form of . .

As the author of eleven published books and seven produced feature films, I have had plenty of dealings with agents and publicity people and always looked over the bios they had written about me. Every author I ever talked to about it always did too. We’re those kind of egotists.

. . in the form of Roger Simon, author and genius, and now that the jury’s cold naked . .

But I have no way of proving that Obama did — although I would faint if he hadn’t.

. . he’ll lose consciousness if he’s wrong. Do you figure Roger for an adult? Most human beings don’t expect to be hospitalized for sloppy editing. This was my point yesterday: wingnuts, with their hearts racing, are currently taking out the president. Their excitement was bizarre to absorb, frankly, but it was clear as day. They’re seconds away from sending Obama to hell. And nothing could ever be sweeter to a self-fellating, America-despising dumb cousin like Roger.

And to further speak of stupid, Breitbart and co. piled on with more posts. And failed, again:

Obama’s Lit Agency Used ‘Born in Kenya’ Bio Until 2007

According to archive.org, a website that caches websites on a regular basis, the Dystel.com website – the official website for Dystel & Goderich, Obama’s literary agents – was using the Barack Obama “born in Kenya” language until April 2007, just two months after then-Senator Obama declared his campaign for the presidency.

Why would a genius use his “Lit Agency” to propagate a writerly Kenyan farce but forget until long after he’s announced his candidacy to orchestrate a political one? You guys are saying he’s facile with identity politics, but there’s no grift bigger than being “American” to run for U.S. President. You are disastrous clowns.

There’s something going on here. I’m not sure what it is, but it isn’t good. Right-wingers run off the rails routinely, I know, so why should I even care? I don’t really know, I guess I’m just mentioning it — something bad is happening.

A Breitbart.com non-story broke today on the newly Harvard-graduated Barack Obama’s old literary agency, Acton & Dystel. In 1991, A&D published a booklet on the agency’s authors. In it, they mistakenly claimed the 29 year-old was born in Africa:

Barack Obama, the first African-American president of the Harvard Law Review, was born in Kenya and raised in Indonesia and Hawaii. The son of an American anthropologist and a Kenyan finance minister, he attended Columbia University and worked as a financial journalist and editor for Business International Corporation.

I cannot imagine a glitch more trivial. A woman from the old A&D tells Political Wire:

You’re undoubtedly aware of the brouhaha stirred up by Breitbart about the erroneous statement in a client list Acton & Dystel published in 1991 (for circulation within the publishing industry only) that Barack Obama was born in Kenya. This was nothing more than a fact checking error by me — an agency assistant at the time. There was never any information given to us by Obama in any of his correspondence or other communications suggesting in any way that he was born in Kenya and not Hawaii. I hope you can communicate to your readers that this was a simple mistake and nothing more.

Neither the truth nor the paltry significance matters. What’s important is that conservatives are finishing this President. He’s disappearing from the planet.

The end begins with breathlessness and hints of ecstasy. An historic political death has begun, just now, and everyone seems to know it. The Hill tried to remain calm, but they have responsibilities you see. When there’s a legitimate “report” of the President being born elsewhere, which makes him an historic liar, which ends his career and administration, throwing the world’s most powerful country into an enormous crisis, they have to write something:

New report of Obama’s birth in Kenya
By Bernie Quigley – 05/17/12 04:18 PM ET

Headline on Drudge this afternoon: “Obama Lit Agent Shocker: ‘Born in Kenya and Raised in Indonesia and Hawaii.’ ” It links to a story in Breitbart showing a full photo of President Obama in a brochure by Acton & Dystel, said to be a literary agency, printed in 1991. Beneath Obama’s picture it states: “Barack Obama, the first African-American president of the Harvard Law Review, was born in Kenya and raised in Indonesia and Hawaii.” The brochure was advancing a book, apparently by Obama, titled Journeys in Black and White.

. . And Elizabeth Warren thought she had problems. My first guess is that if the brochure is legitimate, the then-unknown Obama was tailoring a perhaps fanciful literary persona to make a larger impression. There is as yet no other evidence available that he was actually born in Kenya.

There is as yet no other evidence available that he was actually born in Kenya. No other evidence than this old industry booklet, which counts for a Nairobi tribunal. Let’s remain straight about that, now this:

Even if this was the case and the brochure went out with Obama’s approval, it would diminish his cachet and credibility. But of course if it is true, it would force Obama to leave the presidency.

Visualize a President Joe Biden.

President Biden of Delaware. Somebody please kill him too, thanks (that was close). Reality-wise, there are no other possibilities for this “Kenya,” as these bio details could not be mistaken. And nobody was involved in the publishing of the description, so there’s no way to ask anybody at all about the truth of any of this, and that’s unfortunate. So Barack has to die. That’s journalism.

Wasn’t Roger Simon psychic, or what? Yesterday, when something big was in the air, he asked “Is Obama Imploding?” As if he didn’t know:

. . Obama is about to implode. The signs are everywhere, including the just released North Carolina poll showing Romney in the lead by eight percent in a state Obama won narrowly in 2008.

It is becoming okay not to like Barack Obama.

The Teflon cloak of being a cool, hip black guy, our first African-American president, is losing its power.

Roger today:

We have always branded Bill Clinton a liar . . But the amazing scoop by Breitbart.com today makes Obama one up on Bill. . . as the author of 11 books, I can say that in EVERY instance that I have been published, I have seen such material in advance. It could be that Obama is the exception, but that is highly unlikely.

In other words, we have in the White House a man willing to bend his national identity for profit.

When the Facebook guy does it, hail a hero. When the President does not do it, he’s a “Pathological Liar.” Roger, at least, is not ending the Barack tenure because he’s a foreigner, but because he’s uncool. A greedy, manipulating, lying son-of-a-bitch who’s comeuppance has finally come. Way too goddamned late, frankly.

I will be interviewing Jack Cashill. Some time ago, Mr. Cashill wrote for the American Thinker that Bill Ayers wrote or rewrote Dreams From My Father, the Obama “memoir” that is at issue here. It will be interesting to see what Mr. Cashill has to say on PJTV, because this new revelation from Breitbart adds great credence to his theory.

He’s un-American or a liar, and either way it means Ayers wrote Obama’s autobiography. Surely that’s enough to impeach the slimy bastard. There’s a pretty big line forming at the Senate, though, and Roger’s been running on adrenalin for hours and probably could use a snack. Take five, asshole.

I can hardly recall so many people so sure they were about to destroy a president. They’re so very giddy about it. Because of nothing. Look for the revolution bat signal, I think.

The Obama “Birther” Bombshell Has Finally Arrived
by Myra Adams

Breitbart reports and Drudge is headlining a potential bombshell.

The Vetting – Exclusive – Obama’s Literary Agent in 1991 Booklet: ‘Born in Kenya and raised in Indonesia and Hawaii’

It is only May. Can you imagine what the October presidential campaign will look like?

I’m a little scared, actually.

Pity the poor bigots. When the President changed position on same-sex marriage, why weren’t they ready for it? As much time as they spent hating gay people, and Obama, they should have anticipated it.

They should have been prepared for this: “. . it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same sex couples should be able to get married.” Right then, a vicious co-ordinated salvo of political recriminations should have been launched at Obama’s head. I expected scorched Kenyan.

Instead, it was very lame. It continues at best as a values food fight: all sorts of things going every direction all at once. Mary Matalin’s Sunday take on Obama’s statement was a perfect example. It’s a buffet of every bitter bigoted rant — and wasn’t she lovely as always? But first, Hilary Rosen’s relevant comments. This was on ‘This Week with George Stephanopoulos’:

You know, when I think about it personally, I came out at 17. The idea that a president of the United States would ever say that I could have that kind of a relationship, when all I was trying to do was figure out how, you know, just to sort of walk down the street without worrying about it. And — and I think that kind of clarity, that kind of leadership, it was a politically risky move for the president to take. The fact that he did it I think is really admirable.

Great take. Matalin responded with a 7-sentence reply, parsed for amusement:

. . It’s not risky if you don’t have a choice.

Obama had no choice. Say what?

You don’t get bonus points if you’re doing your job.

Only the left would tell the President to embrace gay marriage because ‘it’s your job mister.’ I think she’s insinuating. . actually I’m not sure how this is an insult. Weird.

He evolved into the position he originally had.

He’s done nothing. It’s just an invisible historic thing, of the sort everyone will surely remember years from now. Oh.

He’s not bold.

He’s a coward. Nice try, phobiapants.

He was for it before he was against it, and then he evolved back to where he started, which is to be for it.

She’s beginning to run in circles. Which of course is annoying for everyone involved.

His vice president outed him.

He’s gay. Gay for gay people but in the closet until, you know, bigmouth Joe.

And the gay community was holding the money up, and he was on his way to George Clooney’s with an open purse.

He’s a Hollywood queen, one of those Santa Monica boulevard types. That image should resonate with America, who are already sick of RuPaul. But then there’s no good argument against marriage equality, is there? The nuts don’t know what else to say.

Counselor?

Thank you, your honor. The defense will show that conservatism is not legally responsible for the awful shit it’s done to us because it’s forever insane.

Exhibit one: Bryan Fischer. Two weeks ago, the spokesman for the American Family Association attacked candidate Mitt Romney for hiring a homosexual, Rick Grenell.

“As I explained in a much-discussed Tweet over the weekend, the message Gov. Romney appears to be sending to the pro-family community through his Grenell appointment is ‘drop dead.’ . .

“This appointment certainly revives the oft-stated concerns about Gov. Romney from both the right and the left that he has no moral core, and is, as one left-wing columnist said, ‘a hollow man.’”

Fischer called Romney spineless. So the candidate fired the homosexual. On Tuesday, Bryan trumpeted this as a “huge win.” Exhibit two:

“Mitt Romney has been forced to say, ‘Look, I overstepped my bounds here. I went outside the parameters here. I went off the reservation with this hire. The pro-family community has called me back to the table here. Called me back inside the borders of the reservation.’”

Romney was now on the right track. He was a man of principle. “I think it improves his chances that evangelicals will support him,” Fischer said. Yesterday, Fischer reflected again on the decision. Exhibit three, the video, please:

“. . if Mitt Romney can be pushed around, intimidated, coerced, co-opted by a conservative radio talk show host in Middle America, then how is he going to stand up to the Chinese? How is he going to stand up to Putin? How is he going to stand up to North Korea if he can be pushed around by a yokel like me? I don’t think Romney is realizing the doubts that this begins to raise about his leadership.”

After Romney did what Bryan Fischer told him to do, Fischer concluded he was spineless. These people are crazier than Old Yeller, your honor. The defense rests.

Well, the Zimmermans are a bunch of assholes. Yes, this is somewhat surprising. It was entirely possible George was an average guy from an average family who simply had a very bad day six weeks ago. Now it looks as if he’s a bad guy from a bad family.

George has been in hiding seemingly from before anyone knew he shot and killed 17 year-old Trayvon Martin in Sanford, Florida. He finally stepped forward yesterday, if digitally, to start a website called ‘therealgeorgezimmerman.com.’ Carrying an immense American flag and adorned with quotes from the Great Granite Conservative, Edmund Burke, the site screams right-wing ass.

Why is shooting an unarmed teen a political statement? Why is it conservative politics? Why is it American and patriotic? These are questions good people would like to ask of George. Me, I don’t begrudge a guy trying to make a lazy buck. But I doubt he’d be too happy if I shot his brother and then launched a red, white and blue website that quoted Saul Alinsky and begged for the public’s cash.

As if that weren’t appalling enough, some member of the family released a letter (exclusive!) to Tucker Carlson’s Edsel blog, The Daily Caller. In it, George’s loved one asks Eric Holder why he hasn’t arrested the New Black Panthers. After that, he comes to a conclusion: you haven’t and you won’t because you are black.

““I am writing you to ask you why, when the law of the land is crystal clear, is your office not arresting the New Black Panthers for hate crimes?” the family member wrote to Holder . . “These threats are very public. If you haven’t been paying attention just do a Google search and you will find plenty. Since when can a group of people in the United States put a bounty on someone’s head, circulate Wanted posters publicly, and still be walking the streets?” . .

After citing the U.S. Department of Justice’s published definition of a “hate crime,” the Zimmerman family member wrote that there is “no other explanation” for Holder’s failure to authorize arrests of New Black Panther Party members, other than the fact that Holder himself is black.

That’s charming and sincere, isn’t it? Dear Eric Holder: you’re a racist. Here, Tucker, post it for the world to see. Thanks, Eric — signed: victims ‘pleading’ for your help.

If that isn’t a red-ass for you. First, if any of the Zimmermans had googled “New Black Panthers,” they’d know that . .
A.) . . they’re all of a couple whackos . .
B.) . . who are considered to be a hate group by the SPLC . .
C.) . . that put out a ‘bounty’ for the citizen’s arrest, not the head, of George.

Second: It is not a crime, hate or other, to demand someone’s arrest. Third, you Zimmermans appear to be racists:

The family member also criticized members of Congress who have forcefully criticized police for failing to arrest George Zimmerman, as well as “the Congressional Black Caucus, the NAACP, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, Spike Lee, [and] President Barack Obama . . ”

What? No Jackie Robinson? No Harry Belafonte? Just the President, who’s mulatto, the CBC, who are black, and the NAACP, who are colored. And a couple ethnics, a few minorities and some dusky types. Here are the President’s comments, incidentally:

“But, obviously, this is a tragedy. I can only imagine what these parents are going through. And when I think about this boy, I think about my own kids. And, you know, I think every parent in America should be able to understand why it is absolutely imperative that we investigate every aspect of this and that everybody pulls together — federal, state and local — to figure out exactly how this tragedy happened.”

We assume Obama’s repeating the word “tragedy” is what enraged the shooter’s family. By the way: Did you see His Africaness host a movie screening last week at the White House? Guess who’s entirely like that poor guy trapped in Harper Lee’s hopeless predicament? Let the weeping begin for the victims of a country’s racial sins:

Noting President Obama’s White House event last week celebrating the 1960 novel “To Kill a Mockingbird,” Zimmerman’s family member drew a novel comparison to the American literary classic.

“Strangely enough this case has a lot of parallels to those of Harper Lee’s ‘To Kill a Mockingbird,’” the letter to Attorney General Holder read. “George Zimmerman has been treated much like Tom Robinson was, chastised for not being the right (or wrong) color and found guilty based on race factors.”

Southern racism shot and killed an unarmed Tom Robinson. George Zimmerman shot and killed an unarmed Martin. They’re like twins, aren’t they? Maybe two of these guys?

Pictured (l to r): sober media, drunken public

Shorter Mona Charen, National Review:

“Rahm Emanuel. The Duke Lacrosse thing was about a ghetto hooker. The Matthew Shepard thing was about a drug deal. Several young black males died February twenty-sixth. One got shot by a white guy. Journalism.”

Pictured (l to r): elegant & eloquent, ugly & unintelligible

Shorter Gina Miller, Renew America:

It’s no surprise somebody shot Trayvon Martin. Black people have become a sub-culture that glorifies incoherent music, anti-social behavior, despicable dress, and even its own unintelligible speech.