On this little blog, I write about how right-wing psyches drive (conservative) political behavior. So the posts tend to migrate toward the strange, the consistently disturbed, the sexually depraved, the furious, the baselessly paranoid, and, perpetually, the irrational.
Given that, the current crop of Conservative presidential candidates provides me with a goldmine, blog-wise. Very few people I know can be this fucked up and still do their jobs. Yet these grotesques beg to run the greatest, most complex country in the history of the planet? Go ahead and try, folks, and my job only gets funnier.
Michele Bachmann? Medievally stupid, as a gargoyle. Or as Jesus-God’s vicious groupie, if he sang for a boy band. He’s awesome and He wrote all of their songs and they voted Him the greatest ever. She’d be the frantic in the backstage alley, scaring off the other star fuckers after the Kid Bible and The Gethsemane Eleven show.
She only can go on as part of His story. Whatever the lyrics say, that’s her.
My husband said, now you need to go and get a post-doctorate degree in tax law. Tax law? I hate taxes. Why should I go and do something like that? But the Lord said, “Be submissive. Wives you are to be submissive to your husband.” And so we moved to Virginia Beach, Virginia, and I went to William and Mary Law School there, for a post-doctorate degree in tax law. And I pursued this course of study. Never had a tax course in my background, never had a desire for it, but by faith, I was going to be faithful to what I felt God was calling me to do through my husband.
That’s what He wants. He talks, through dusty texts, and Michele listens. Or the husband talks, Marcus. The fallible, closeted, overachieving homosexual. Plenty of sane folks wondered if, as president, we weren’t really considering him for Commander in Chief.
BYRON YORK: In 2006, when you were running for Congress, you described a moment in your life when your husband said you should study for a degree in tax law. You said you hated the idea. And then you explained, “But the Lord said, ‘Be submissive. Wives, you are to be submissive to your husbands.’” As president, would you be submissive to your husband? . .
MICHELE BACHMANN: Marcus and I will be married for 33 years this September 10th. I’m in love with him. I’m so proud of him. And both he and I — what submission means to us, if that’s what your question is, it means respect. I respect my husband. He’s a wonderful, godly man, and a great father. And he respects me as his wife. That’s how we operate our marriage.
Well, she’s bullshitting now, isn’t she? She’s toning down the fan-girl, wearing sleeves to cover up the tattoos so she can get through the job interview. Doesn’t matter how you describe your ‘respect,’ submission is denying your judgment and will. Bachmann’s legendary, if not ecstatic, description of how she ended up a distasteful tax attorney appeases the ancient biblical entreaty.
And apologists cannot elevate it:
As ‘submissive’ wife, Bachmann delicately treads Bible, modernity
David Goldstein | McClatchy Newspapers | Wed, Aug. 17, 2011
. . Peter Sprigg, a senior fellow for policy studies at the conservative Family Research Council, said he believed that concerns over a tension between Bachmann’s adherence to an ancient biblical code and her duties should she become president were misplaced.
. . Sprigg said most evangelical Christians don’t believe that a husband is a “dictator,” but that both he and his wife should discuss issues thoroughly and try to reach consensus.
“The idea of a wife submitting to her husband is kind of a tiebreak,” he said. “Only those circumstances where they’re unable to reach a consensus is it necessary for the wife to exercise this.”
Married women will appreciate this. When they agree with their husbands, the husbands get their way. When they disagree with their husbands but later change their minds, the husbands get their way. When they disagree with their husbands and refuse to give in — then it becomes a ‘tie.’ That’s when it’s “necessary” for wives to become submissive, and the husbands get their way. This is pathetic.