After being on the road for months, Tea Party jackalope and serenader of crackers Lloyd Marcus has finally made it back. His “Rebuild America Defeat Obama” tour did great work, traveling across the country and reaffirming fundamental Midwestern values, victimization and xenophobia. But after attending to the Okies’ needs, what has he gotten in return? One wonders.

Lloyd is home, but he is tired. He is spent. He is depressed. And after everything he’s done, is anyone thinking about him? Whose turn is it to attend to his needs? Because Lloyd is not what he used to be. Do you remember him back in the day? This was last April, 2012. Title: “Democrats Responsible for Black Culture of Anger.” Flash…

…Blacks are seven times more likely than people of other races to commit murder, and eight times more likely to commit robbery. Blacks are three times more likely to use a handgun and twice as likely to use a knife. Forty-five percent of black crime is against whites, 43 percent against other blacks, and 10 percent against Hispanics. Who can deny that black criminals are angry at whites and fellow blacks? Blacks are seven times more likely to end up in prison.

Black people are assholes.

Folks, I am not one for frivolous lawsuits. Still, I cannot help contemplating a lawsuit all the same: We the People vs. the Democratic Party for severe damages resulting from them creating and fueling for years a culture of anger in black America.

Democrats know damn well what Negroes are like. But do they criticize them? Do they arrest them? Do they punish them? No. They give them food stamps. And that’s how they buy Thunderbird and switchblades on a Friday night. There oughta be a law.

But now. Lloyd Marcus, only two days ago. Title: “An Angry Black Man.” Oh dear:

Shopping for salad stuff in Walmart, I focused on a sign “Gold Bell Peppers $1.68 each.” To my surprise, I became extremely angry. As absurd as it sounds, $1.68 for one bell pepper was the straw that broke the camel’s back. It epitomized my frustration and anger over the idiocy of Obama voters. Why in the world would they allow Obama to continue destroying our country?

Going off at the Walmart? Your Uncle Tom is no match for the power of the Dark Side.

I need time for God to give me the grace to forgive my black family. I am furious and extremely disappointed in them for voting skin-color over Christian principles…

I will not apologize for my anger … mine is a righteous anger. Evil appearing to triumph should make one angry…

I am angry over the willful ignorance and racism of black America…

I am outraged regarding the blatant voter fraud in states where a photo ID was not required to vote…

Lloyd, the Force runs strong in your family. Take the government cheese…

They’re here. Barack Obama trounced Mitt Romney in Maine, 56% to 41%. The counting appears to be over. The racism goes on:

Maine Republican Party Chairman Charlie Webster is once again alleging possible voting irregularities, this time claiming that groups of unknown black people showed up in some rural towns to vote on Election Day . .

“In some parts of rural Maine, there were dozens, dozens of black people who came in and voted on Election Day,” he said. “Everybody has a right to vote, but nobody in (these) towns knows anyone who’s black. How did that happen? I don’t know. We’re going to find out.”

The grizzled lobster furriers were so shocked at the sight of Night People that they called the Chairman. ‘There are black people here, Charlie.’ Charlie bolted upright, ‘WHAT?’ They repeated ‘Black people! There are blacks here!’ The sobbing, hoarse and husky, began. ‘How could it be?’ the Chairman thought.

He said his point is not that the new voters were black, but that they were not recognized by town officials.

“I’m not talking about 15 or 20. I’m talking hundreds,” he said Wednesday.

If we’re talking 107,317 black people, then Maine has a problem. Integration.

I try not to bitch about an idiot’s post more than once. But this Dennis Prager racial kumbaya in the National Review is such a howler:

Still the Least Racist Country in the World
by Dennis Prager | National Review

In light of the tragic killing of black teenager Trayvon Martin — and the manufactured hysteria surrounding it — one thing needs to be stated as clearly and as often as possible: The United States is the least racist and least xenophobic country in the world . .

As I said before, we are aware of all wingnut traditions. Trayvon is dead, and Derbyshire’s an unemployed National Review Klanspundit. And now the Review’s Robert Weissberg, American Renaissance racialist emeritus, has been shitcanned as well. Are we to pretend Prager wasn’t trotted out to cover butts?

It’s too bad Dennis the Handholder couldn’t have held his tongue. After the community harmonizing, he begins lashing the liberals and African Americans. One bunch are politically greedy, and the other are, well, stupid and defective:

The left-wing drumbeat about America as racist is a combination of politics and black memory.

The political aspect is this: The Democrats and the Left both recognize that if blacks cease viewing themselves as victims of racism, the Democratic party can no longer offer itself as black America’s savior.

Hey, Black People: who’s your savior? I’m going to gamble here that they would answer “no one.” Also, “fuck off.” If black folks have a problem, as usual, they take it on themselves. Mind you, yes, we all want friends, and we could all use a little understanding as we go about our lives. But the idea that black america are Penelope tied to the railroad tracks and white people are, what, Dudley Doo-Right? Dennis has barely begun to hurl the insults:

And if only one out of three black Americans ceases to regard to [sic] himself as a victim of racism, and votes accordingly, it will be very difficult for Democrats to win any national election.

Once A Black no longer wrongly, stupidly considers “himself . . a victim of racism,” he votes Republican. This is edifying. Unlike everybody else, blacks just don’t have ‘politics.’ They don’t know or care for issues, like the economy, or taxes, or healthcare. They’re just sort of . . there. And Republicanism is their default functional state, like breathing. Breathing with your mouth.

The other issue is black memory. Apparently, most blacks either cannot or refuse to believe that the vast majority of whites are no longer racists.

. . danger! Dennis Prager . .

Most Americans were hopeful that the election of a black president — thereby making America the first white society in history to choose a black leader — would finally put to rest the myth of a racist America. More than three years later it seems not to have accomplished a thing . .

And the nob gets twisted off. Like most Conservatives, Dennis thinks black people are wrong. Here he writes it’s because they cling to memories. Hey, somebody put the electrodes to this neuro-malady. Maybe that’s what these guys were trying to do, scare the memory-wits out of people?

But pushing Zimmerman and Derbyshire and Weissberg far aside, friends — why not! — one can see, if one squints, very VERY hard, little racism in America. One problem down, but scientists are stumped by this:

. . aliens hacking into Michigan road signs. Geez, that was three days ago, bitter elephants. If you just could loosen your grip on a few historical blunders, Dennis’ utopia awaits our melting pot. Look how close we are to it. We’re “the first white society in history to choose a black leader.”

Right. Any of you spit the coffee reading that? Dennis would write something so gawdawful Wonder Bread. He, like most National Review poltergeists, really does live in a “white society.” But surely he didn’t vote for Barack, so his argument’s pretty much a drug deal.

The gob-slapping comedy here comes when Dennis volunteers the rest of America for “white society.” Myself, I don’t live anywhere near one, I live in Los Angeles. Like San Diego, New Orleans, Miami, Detroit, or Atlanta, it’s full of people of all kinds. Like the 50 states where the first Americans, the Indians, still live. You get my point. Mr. Racehugs couldn’t even account for the colored asses he’s been kissing.

I came across this sorry effort by Dennis Prager to shoehorn brotherhood sunshine up the asses of National Review readers. Like we don’t know what he’s doing. Roy Edroso will tell you, here, how rightbloggers were totally! right on! when NR’s John Derbyshire posted his kamikaze ‘black people’ screed. Now that Derb’s been canned, the adults at Review are sober, glum, taking of stock, re-orienting their horizons, and doing whatever it is geniuses do after one of them dons a monogrammed Klan robe at an Easter party.

Dennis has decided to bring some ‘hey buddies!’ to the gloomfest. He asks: Who’s the nicest, friendliest, race-lovin’est country in the history of all planets? Can you possibly guess? Silly . . it’s America!

In light of the tragic killing of black teenager Trayvon Martin — and the manufactured hysteria surrounding it — one thing needs to be stated as clearly and as often as possible: The United States is the least racist and least xenophobic country in the world. Foreigners of every race, ethnicity, and religion know this.

You see where Dennis is heading. This social ruckus isn’t about George Zimmerman hawking and then reflexively killing a black kid. Derb is no life-long racist who finally flashed us the Brit-cracker full monty. These clashes are merely media spats. And they disappear when you step back to view the proper landscape of America. You can’t spot such ‘racialist’ motes in the panorama that is the kindest, most trusting country that’s ever been.

Don’t believe me? Just listen to all the first-hand accounts of “Foreigners of every race, ethnicity, and religion” that Dennis interviews for the post. Do a little re-orienting of your own, libtards, in the faces of the frequently and heartily embraced huddled masses:

Black Africans know this. That is why so many seek to live in the United States. Decades ago, the number of black Africans who had immigrated . .

Rrright. Now watch:

Members of other races and nationalities know this. Even Muslim and Arab writers have noted that nowhere in the Arab or larger Muslim world does an Arab or any other Muslim have the individual rights . .

Just, hmm. Here they come:

And when any of these people come here, they are accepted as Americans the moment they identify as such. If someone — from anywhere, speaking any language . .

And one, now, from somewhere:

A third-generation Turkish-German, whose German is indistinguishable from the German spoken by an indigenous German, will still be regarded by most Germans as a Turk. The same holds true elsewhere in Europe . .

FROM SOMEWHERE . .

On the other hand, a first-generation Turkish American, who speaks English with a heavy Turkish accent, but who identifies as American, will be regarded . .

Dennis, a human? Please?

Xenophobic? It is probably fair to say that most Americans are xenophiles. Last week, in Tampa, I met a 40-year-old man who works at a cigar lounge and bar.

Whew! Finally, someone to speak to the snuggly immigrant experience. Do tell.

. . I commented on all the good-looking women who entered his establishment, and he told me that despite his low salary, that is precisely the reason he works there. They flock to him, he said.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because of my accent.” He was from Russia.

Suck it, bitches. And they do. So ends Dennis’ evidence for: America greatest furriner and black-lovin’ nation ever Jesus made.

Just came across John Derbyshire’s ultra-racist Trayvon riposte in Taki’s Magazine. This was surely inspired by so many black people talking publicly about themselves and their concerns. The tragedy has become too much for the National Review’s Dorkasaurus Rex to tolerate.

Derb reminds me a bit of my own Dad. He was an engineer. When I was 11, he gave me the talk about sex. It lasted ten minutes. It was the first time anyone read me a technical instruction manual, I guessed, from memory. At least it was in English, so that was nice.

There’s also a little bit of my sophomore year Berkeley roommate in Derb. He was 100% organic chemist, 100% of the time. I remember when my girlfriend came up from Santa Barbara to visit me, the roommate seemed impressed with her looks. The minute she stepped out of the room, he looked at me blankly and asked: “HAVE YOU MADE LOVE TO HER?” I tried to Scanners his fucking head, but he didn’t even blink.

What I’m trying to say: John carries on not only in combative and stupid fashion, but also with the sort of brain damage that renders him perfectly insulting. He and the similar cubes feel it’s a personal strength rather than a flaw people want to beat to death with clubs. John thinks he is the Excalibur that’s laid low the shallow premises and lazy thinking around him. He’s really an Asperger’s bully-hire the National Review trot out to headbutt liberals.

Women, for example. In September of 2009, he appeared on Alan Colmes’ radio show. This was his ‘political‘ argument . .

Alan: What is the case against female suffrage?

John: Well the conservative case against it is that, is that women lean hard to the left. They, uh, they want someone to, to nurture, they want someone to help raise their kids, and if men aren’t inclined to do it, which in the present days they’re not much, then they’d like the state to do it for them.

Got that? Again:

John: Among the hopes that I do not realistically nurse is the hope that female suffrage will be repealed.

You figure even the National Review might recognize Derb for the deeply disturbed man he is. But no, they just love him.

He is a shining example of conservatives’ calculated depravity. You have to assume someone so poorly mentally composed would stomp a toddler or start a tragic fire at some point. Today’s post comes close to doing it. Here Derb writes to warn ‘his’ kids in the same manner those tragic-glorious black people warn their own about America:

(10a) Avoid concentrations of blacks not all known to you personally.

(10i) If accosted by a strange black in the street, smile and say something polite but keep moving . .

Derb will swear he is honest and he is brilliant. He’s just mentally ill.

Hark! Nanook of Tiara Borealis Klondike Parkaboobs:

“I want to see this thing continue because iron sharpens iron, steel sharpens steel,’’ Ms. Palin said . . “These guys are getting better in their debates, they’re getting more concise, they’re getting more grounded . .’’

. . they’re getting more deflected, denatured and disintegrated by the multi-thousand BTU Chinese forge of Republican politics. There are barely months to settle on a wingnut, but who will conquer tomorrow? Everybody has to know. Hail heavy metal Freedonia.

Newton’s latest strategy has been to eliminate anyone in sight still breathing. So he’s been taking it to the dead-white and blue capitalist, Chet Bainbot. He’s been taking it to the black children, destined to do no work. He’s been taking it to the gritty streets of South Carolina, where folks still (sshhh) prefer ‘others’ step off the sidewalk as they approach.

And whaddyaknow. It’s working:

Rasmussen Poll: Gingrich closes gap with Romney nationally
The State Column

Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich’s relentless attacks against rival candidate Mitt Romney appear to be working, as a Rasmussen Reports poll released Wednesday indicates he is just three percentage points behind Mr. Romney nationwide. The poll finished with Mr. Romney garnering 30 percent of the votes, while Mr. Gingrich finished at 27 percent.

Now, that’s a Rasmussen poll. Meaning the numbers look spectacular and are surely wrong. But Newthor is definitely closing the gap. His campaign got so excited after Monday’s debate they put together this clip:

For context, let’s add . . uh, context. The get-up-and-stomp-your-jackboots ovation for Newtran (dubbed “The Moment” by his humble campaign) came as a result of moderator Juan Williams pressing Gingrich on his “black people” rhetoric. As in, “black people drive like this,” and “black people yell at movies,” and “I hate black people too.” Right-wing Newsmax reported the reverse-lynching this way:

Gingrich Slams Juan Williams in Racial Exchange
Maxi-News | ‘White Lady Fresh’

. . “Can’t you see this is viewed, at a minimum, as insulting to all Americans, but as particularly to black Americans?” Williams said.

“No, I don’t see that,” Gingrich answered, prompting cheers and applause from the audience. He also recalled the fact that his own daughter Jackie did janitorial work for her first job.

“Only the elites despise earning money,” he said.

DUDE! That’s what you get for being racist, Juaaan. Or Hwaaaan. Maybe I putee fyou bettah unnastann: chingchong linglong, bitch. Winning.

Meanwhile, demonstrating a steely capacity for institutional-thuggery, someone in the Romney campaign directed ABC to talk to Marianne Gingrich, Newtrul’s second wife. This is the only thing anyone in the solar system is talking about tonight. It’s the end of everything, politics-wise, forever. Plus it has consequences. Given Newchan’s self-centered approach to affection (he loves his prostate, where he lives in a Spanish Mediterranean jizzball), the interview tomorrow will be devastating. If there’s an audience or a god, he will be dead by Friday.

Not to be outdone: someone else. Next: Rick Santorum. He’s piggybacking the anti-Gingrich campaign. He’d like to point out the difference between himself and the in flagrante davenportia Georgian:

Former Pennsylvania senator Rick Santorum told a Spartanburg crowd Wednesday that the only woman he’s ever sat on a couch with is his wife, a not-so-subtle dig at former House speaker Newt Gingrich, who appeared seated next to Democrat Nancy Pelosi in a 2008 ad urging action on climate change.

Whoa.

Black guys drive like this: doot de doo. White guys drive like this: dopey dopey doopey dope. The chairman now recognizes Representative Simpson, the gentleman from Springfield:

It’s true! We’re so lame!

Alright, enough intellectual floobey doo — let’s check in on Oklahoma Republicans. Any news from there on the “differences between the races”? Anyone have a fresh take on any particular divide between American habits and cultures?

Hmm? Far right-winger Sally Kern has taken the floor to address her colleagues? This should be good. By that, I mean awful.

“We have heard tonight already that in prison there’s more black people. Yes, there are, and that’s tragic. It’s tragic that our prisons here in Oklahoma, what are they, 99% occupancy? But the other side of the story, perhaps we need to consider: is this just because they’re Black that they’re in prison, or could it be because they didn’t want to work hard in school? And White people oftentimes don’t want to work hard in school, or Asians, oftentimes. But a lot of times, that’s what happens. I taught school for twenty years, and I saw a lot of people of color who didn’t want to work as hard, they wanted it given to them. Matter of fact I had one student that said, ‘I don’t need to study, you know why? The government’s gonna take care of me.’”

Isn’t that just like kids? Telling their wingnut teachers they want to live on welfare for the rest of their lives? I absolutely, completely believe Sally Kern.

Some poor soul named Jade dared to call the Dr. Laura show with a complaint of racial stupidity: my white husband’s friends keep coming by and dropping ‘How do you black people like doin’ this?’ And ‘You black people like doin’ that.’

Genius Dr. Laura pegs Jade for hypersensitive. Jade, look, my bodyguard’s black, gee he’s a dear friend. I know that black guys say “nigger.” Is that racist? Nigger nigger nigger.

Jade thinks about it over commercial break. Y’know, I don’t like hearing you say “nigger,” Dr. Laura.

Dr. Laura: Jade, you loser, if you’re too sensitive to hear “nigger” coming from white people, you shouldn’t have married one of us:

Epic.