Tag Archives: sarah palin

Why, rancid populism? You’re soaking in it.

Now that the gabber-puss grapefruit has tied our poor Pauline to the tracks the National Review sees itself fit to leap into the frame stage right carrying a pair of red white and blue rose shears. My goodness what a development! And it was just past the nick of time…

…he is not deserving of conservative support in the caucuses and primaries. Trump is a philosophically unmoored political opportunist who would trash the broad conservative ideological consensus within the GOP in favor of a free-floating populism with strong-man overtones.

Look at this awful horrible no good man:

Trump’s political opinions have wobbled all over the lot…He has exploited the yawning gap between elite opinion in both parties and the public on immigration… Sometimes he wants to let Russia fight ISIS, and at others he wants to “bomb the sh**” out of it… His obsession is with “winning,” regardless of the means — a spirit that is anathema to the ordered liberty that conservatives hold dear… Indeed, Trump’s politics are those of an averagely well-informed businessman…if you have no familiarity with the relevant details and the levers of power, and no clear principles to guide you, you will, like most tenderfeet, get rolled.

dumping donaldThis ‘Trump’ is amoral and unprincipled. He has no idea what America’s problems are nor is he interested in solving them. He’s a loudmouth populist who will say anything to appeal to the unwashed masses who have overrun the right-wing. Well! What a white-hot indictment of conservative politics — and of the snarling seed-fruit who has so shamefully brought it down.

This last ditch effort of National Review’s is written by The Editors, meaning Rich Lowry. I have to wonder how Rich managed to get himself into this sorry position. How did he end up having to kneecap the 2016 Republican front-runner in order to save His America?

I don’t expect to hear anything from him regarding that. Because it wasn’t eight years ago that he watched a completely amoral and unprincipled newcomer bring a say-anything style to the presidential race in order to appeal to the slackjaw imbeciles. And lo-and-behold if it wasn’t Sarah Palin who flabbergasted The Editors.

I’m sure I’m not the only male in America who, when Palin dropped her first wink, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, “Hey, I think she just winked at me.” And her smile. By the end, when she clearly knew she was doing well, it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing.

Is there any more rancid person in national politics than Palin? I’m thinking but I don’t have an answer.

It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America. This is a quality that can’t be learned; it’s either something you have or you don’t, and man, she’s got it.

Rich Lowry went apeshit for her. And what exactly is the difference between Palin and Trump? Here it is: He’s better at this horrible crap. She’s a little more obsessed with the military – that’s about it. Lowry thinks he can swoop right in and save the day but the Trump nomination has been in the making for many years. And if there’s anyone to blame for the Horror Named Trump you can start with the anti-intellectual immigrant-bashing unprincipled know-nothing cynical fuckwad, Rich Lowry.

Trump boasted Saturday that support for his presidential campaign would not decline even if he shot someone in the middle of a crowded street.

“I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn’t lose voters,” Trump said at a campaign rally here.

Douche? It’s all too late. Way too late.


Advice from a popular dumbass

Governor Klondike Parkaderp puts on her cramp-ons and clods her way through the pages of National Review, where the readership revel in her presence. The usual NR dog turd gets a staid dozen or so comments, but Palin’s Freedom-steamer has already amassed 600 700 800 comments. And my marshmallow martians, if ever there were a more volcanic pit of flaming gibberish, then I weep for our cosmic soul.

As Freedom Destroys Itself
Laws can’t protect a society that has lost its way.
By Sarah Palin | National Review

All of us were horrified by the murders at the Washington Navy Yard this week.

Horse puckey. You don’t give a damn and everybody knows it.

Once again, in the aftermath of a shooting, a new installment of the debate about gun laws has broken out. But what we really need is a new discussion about what kind of people we are and what kind of country we want to be.

Obviously you don’t think you’re the problem. You’re trying to make this about us, the gun control advocates who are also, I’m guessing, prone to watch movies or play video games and thereby hatch a mental illness. It’s all that’s left of bullet-ridden America after you exempt conservatism from the controversy.

It’s no secret which side I’m on in any debate involving the Second Amendment…

Remember that epic argument? Over whether to abolish that particular part of the Constitution? And how Sarah weighed in on the ‘pro’ side, and then rallied the cause, and won the day? It’s the only reason why the Second Amendment still exists. That turned out to be a pretty big feather in her cap…

. . (or the whole Constitution, for that matter).

Oh YEAH. She was also for the entire Constitution as well. Golly she sure knows how to pick ’em.

Okay here’s ostensibly the central point of this gutless burp:

A decent and moral society is guided by voluntary self-restraint.

You don’t say! There’s something that never occurred to me. Much as we’d all like to shoot down or rape everyone at our jobs, we really should learn to employ a dollop of restraint. But not the non-self type of restraint, where your girlfriend beats you back with a whip. And not the involuntary kind of self-restraint, where you enter the daycare center with an AK-47 but then suffer a poorly-timed epileptic seizure. Please use instead the kind of restraint where, you know, just whatever don’t. Thanks, dumbass.


This song is over

Witness for yourself the death of a politician.

No one in recent American history burst onto the political scene as spectacularly as Sarah Palin in 2008. John McCain’s surprise VP pick made the covers of both Time and Newsweek. Her highly anticipated speech at the September national convention jump-started the moribund Republican campaign. People who normally despised politics watched it and were thrilled. National Review editor Rich Lowry fell hisself utterly in love:

By the end, when she clearly knew she was doing well, it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America. This is a quality that can’t be learned; it’s either something you have or you don’t, and man, she’s got it.

But Lowry didn’t yet know the real Sarah Palin.

“Though I was during the campaign running for V.P., I was banned from talking about Jeremiah Wright and Obama’s friend Bill Ayers,” Palin said in a Fox News interview. “Couldn’t talk about that. Couldn’t talk about Obama’s lack of knowledge, and job inexperience, and the things that he said like America had 57 states, things like that.”

This is who she is.

Palin continued, “in the campaign, Greta this is important for Americans to understand, I wasn’t allowed to talk about things like that because those elitist, those who are the brainiacs in the GOP machine running John McCain’s campaign at the time, said that the media would eat us alive if we brought up these things.”

A caustic human being. Stupid to boot. Her glorious time on the American stage is drawing to a close and all she can think to do is be nasty. The more Americans see of Palin the Politician, the less they find to like.

It’s not a match up likely to occur but Clinton would destroy Sarah Palin in a hypothetical match up in the state, 53/37, including a 62/25 lead with independents. There’s no appetite among Alaskans for Palin 2016 – only 16% think she should run to 78% who think she should not, and even among Republicans just 18% would like to see her make a bid.

Her time is up. All she has left is her ambition.


Joan of White Trash

During a dynamic and lively speech at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) on Saturday, Sarah Palin poked fun at New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg’s campaign to reduce obesity by limiting the availability of large sugary drinks.

Halfway through her speech, while describing exchanging guns with her husband Todd for Christmas, the former Alaska governor pulled out a Big Gulp from behind the podium, smirked, took several sips, and remarked, “Oh Bloomberg is not around, our Big Gulp is safe! We’re cool. Shoot, it’s just pop!”


Daily Caller: Mama said knock you out

For three years, you sit around and get fat. For one year, you sweat it out in training camp. Then for 12 hours tomorrow, you’re in a heavyweight fight. Today’s your last chance to talk trash.

TUCKER CARLSON AND NEIL PATEL: Wave goodbye to the Obama media

By tomorrow night we’ll likely know the name of the next president. But we already know the loser in this election cycle: political reporters. They’ve disgraced themselves.

Who makes the charges? The worst political reporters in America.

14 months ago, Tucker’s Daily Caller dug up and then featured Mike Tyson’s frat-boy comments about Sarah Palin. Mike thought it would be righteous if a certain conservative politician had sex with a well-endowed black man:

Mike Tyson: Sarah Palin met ‘the wombshifter’

. . Tyson took a few shots at Palin, boasting about interracial sex and the allegation that Palin had an affair with former NBA star Glen Rice.

“Glen Rice is a wonderful man,” Tyson said. “He’s a wonderful guy. You want her to be with somebody like [Dennis] Rodman getting up … in there. Pushing her guts up in the back of her head!”

This is the politics Carlson et. al. feature in their internet fishwrap. As far as I know, the ‘wombshifter’ is still the most popular piece they’ve ever posted. Clearly, other outlets are not as honorable as they are, the pundits who constructed a headline with Palin’s dented uterus:

Not in our lifetimes have so many in the press dropped the pretense of objectivity in order to help a political candidate. The media are rooting for Barack Obama. They’re not hiding it.

Consider Benghazi.

Consider him. First we get a hold of Ben’s urologist, Ray Mancini. Then we ask: Dr. Boom Boom, how likely is Ben to injure, say, Phyllis Schlafly?


Sarah Palin having a bad toobs day

Governor Moosemeat had a bad media day. Everywhere the subject of Sarah went, the insults followed. First, CNN mocked her:

That didn’t sit well with Palin’s fans.

I’ll be damned if I’m going to let a bunch of twisted sex perverts and their bisexual, jiveass negro of a President run their sick agenda on my country. Let’s all go to Chick-Fil-A every chance we get and make sure it’s a winner.

FinickyGreek 3 hours ago

Then Dick Cheney trashed her. Asked about the serious business of picking vice presidents, saved-by-the-heart-of-a-gay-Guatemalan-blow-job-champion Richard called McCain’s choosing of the calisthenic tundraclown “a mistake”:

Cheney would not comment on what he told Romney and Myers, but he was harsh in his assessment of McCain’s decision to pick Palin.

“That one,” Cheney said, “I don’t think was well handled.”

“The test to get on that small list has to be, ‘Is this person capable of being president of the United States?’”

Cheney believes Sarah Palin failed that test.

“I like Governor Palin. I’ve met her. I know her. She – attractive candidate. But based on her background, she’d only been governor for, what, two years. I don’t think she passed that test…of being ready to take over. And I think that was a mistake.”

Sarah Palin hasn’t been interested in governing anything since she quit on her home state. So, in Dick-world, she’ll never be “capable of being president of the United States.” Thwack. Commenters mostly piled on the put down. But some fans of the famous shrill faced off with the pack:

What a total moron you are to actually post as :God” who you probably spit upon with your disgusting sexual habit, and body eroding weed. Take another hit of Mary Jane and kill your brain cells more along with the rest of you sick entourage and voters so the rest of us will be rid of you perverted filth.

Posted by: DJ | 3:28 pm


Mittens and the surrogate flu

Just how bad is the Romney campaign? It’s hard to say. How do you gauge a trail of warmwater puke? By distance or volume?

These campaigns all have their strengths and weaknesses. The remarkable thing about Romney’s is its 360-degree Achilles heel. The candidate is a terrible speaker, he’s unlikable in person, he doesn’t interest the base, he refuses to address any issue that voters are interested in, and he’s paranoid and secretive about himself. Throw in he’s richer than most porn barons and he gets his politics the same way the rest of us get cologne samples: from bogus magazines. And you, Republicans, have got yourself one stinking candidate.

You would think these alarming facts would rally the believers to his side. You’d think it would make the GOP faithful defend him with every bone in their bodies. Everybody all in, do or die, with fangs bared and instincts razor sharp-ed. Instead, something entirely different has happened. They’ve gone hapless, limp. They’re stupor-stricken. They’ve been Mittified.

“I think you hit a reset button for the fall campaign. Everything changes,” [Eric] Fehrnstrom responded. “It’s almost like an Etch A Sketch. You can kind of shake it up, and we start all over again.”

Eric really isn’t this stupid. He’s just that sick. He’s spent too much time up close and personal with the Typhoid Mary of Manageitis. The candidate is a continental weather front of business entity. A middle-of-the-menu marathon of oatmeal and 1% milk. A Beacon of Industry (god rest his soul). And Eric is now desperately ill. Ask that sparkplug Dilbert, he knows of what I speak.

[Chuck] TODD: He agrees with the president that it is not [a tax], and he believes that you shouldn’t call the tax penalty a tax, you should call it a penalty or a fee or a fine?

FEHRNSTROM: That’s correct.

Brains. Romney politely went everywhere the next day to label the ACA mandate a ‘tax.’ This electrified the campaign in the only way a talking mackerel can. You really should tell your guy what you want, Mitt, before you throw him out there. Do you know what you want? Do fish have feelings?

“There may have been a thought at the time that [Romney] could be part-time. It was not part-time. The Olympics was in a shambles,” [Ed] Gillespie told Candy Crowley on CNN’s “State of the Union.”

“He took a leave of absence and in fact, Candy, ended up not going back at all and retired retroactively to February 1999 as a result,” Gillespie said.

Ed said this more than once. So it’s spreading. Either the CEO can’t manage his people, or he’s contagious. If you’re keeping them around to harvest their suitable organs, Mitt, forget it. It’s too late.

Asked why he chose not to go with Romney, McCain said: “Oh come on, because we thought that Sarah Palin was the better candidate. Why did we not take Pawlenty, why did we not take any of the other 10 other people. Why didn’t I? Because we had a better candidate, the same way with all the others. … Come on, why? That’s a stupid question.”

Even McCain? Good lord. Well he’s pretty old, and I don’t figure his immune system for much by now. Btw, if a major Republican personality had paid McCain this same compliment in 2008, John would have popped up on the bastard’s doorstep and beat him into a hamburger patty. Mitt will have Eric call and relay the campaign’s thanks.


I wonder just how smart Marco Rubio really is

Marco Rubio has a shot at becoming Mitt Romney’s running mate. He’s the Tea Party’s hottest star. Pundits say the Cuban senator would make a great VP choice: young, handsome, Southern and loaded with anti-government spunk. Rubio on the ticket could pay all sorts of dividends come November.

Then again, Republican candidates pick lousy running mates. They love morons. Remember Dan Quayle? Young, good looking, relaxed and Midwestern as opposed to snotty and Kennebunkport. Dumb as cold steel. The only thing that prevented Dan from scuttling the 1988 election was that the Dukakis campaign proved to be even less wise.

Sarah Palin, four years ago. Young, good-looking, cheery and fun-loving, not much Unca VC Rage. A needed breath of fresh air. Unfortunately, the campaign was deep underwater and promptly rolled over, bobbing limp and face down for the final months. Sarah suffocated McCain’s last hopes. Still, she provided the political world with plenty laughs, a sacrifice she makes even today.

Cheney, honestly, was an historically bad pick. Someone who’s nearly instantly despised by the American public and stokes the worst incompetent, murderous instincts of a bad president rates a disaster. Dick will be a major reason why the Bush administrations will long be considered blood-shedding disasters.

So what about this Rubio? I wonder if there’s not something wrong with him. I’m thinking the guy is stupid. That would pretty much make him a lock for Romney’s running mate, of course.

How will the Mittbots spin this? Rubio bought a house and threw it on the foreclosure bonfire. That’s not a good idea. It’s worse after you argue the economy suffers because of irresponsibility and greed. But rather than honor his politics or financial commitments, Marco just stopped paying his mortgage.

Maybe then this is not the height of scumbaggery any more, ripping off the straight-shooting Christian bank community? Maybe this is a sign of Rubio’s shrewd business sense, or something.

Does Paying Your Mortgage Make You a Good Person, or a Stupid Person?
Moneyland/Time Magazine | By Brad Tuttle

If your home is underwater—meaning you owe more on your mortgage than the property is now worth—simply walking away may make the most business sense. Considering the ongoing foreclosure mess, it would seem easier than ever to just stop paying the mortgage and enjoy what amounts to “free rent” until the lenders get their paperwork in order . .

See? It’s clever to cheat the banks. Rugged individualism. Why doesn’t everyone do it?

. . 1) they love their homes and don’t want to ever lose them; 2) they believe the real estate market will rebound and their homes won’t be underwater for long; or 3) they think that paying the mortgage is the right thing to do.

Obviously, that’s not Marco. He’s too smart for that. But maybe not.

Rubio sought to cast the foreclosure issue as a simple misunderstanding; “There was a disagreement with the bank about how much the monthly payments were,” he told Baier, adding: “And it all got confusing.”

The future vice president couldn’t understand his mortgage.

BANK: You owe us two thousand dollars a month.

RUBIO: What?

BANK: Two thousand dollars. Per month.

RUBIO: What?

So the bank took his house. Also, he bought it with David Rivera, which was dumb.


That modern stylin’ woman, conservative wise

Conservative writer S.E. Cupp waited a few days to weigh in on the Hilary Rosen/Ann Romey debate. Between the lovely mansion mommy and the lesbian grotto shrew, S.E. favors mommy. Actually, she favors mansions — more on that later.

But let’s cut to the chase, friends. S.E. Cupp is a fool. Facts are facts. It’s frankly boring she’d love the Romneys so well because she’s paid for the support. The way she loves Ann, however, is terrifically bimb-tertaining.

We could have predicted it. S.E. frequently finds ways to make readers wince. This, below, was a face-palmer of hers from a couple years ago:

Manhattan Love Story
Help! I am a hip, young New Yorker. I am not supposed to have a crush on Mike Huckabee.
By S.E. Cupp| Slate | Dec 5 2008

There he is on the front page of his eponymous Web site, lovingly fingering his bass guitar in the gently worn leather boots of a man who lives to rock. Over the past few weeks, he’s been crisscrossing the country in a fully appointed tour bus that delivers him to throngs of adoring fans and groupies who eagerly await an autograph, a photo, and—if they’re lucky—maybe a few licks on the guitar.

That’s Cupp’s habit. She shocks her true cosmopolitan with a pedestrian reflex here and there. On the way to an Icelandic/Argentinian fusion tapas tasting, she’ll land at McDonald’s. “Here I am with Chicken McNuggets! Can you believe it?” Her mind and instincts are as sharp as any Columbia professor’s, you should know. If only the academics were as hungry to know the limits of the world. She walks old absinthe gallery reading rooms, polishing anti-Bolshevik propaganda with an X-Acto and a pen. But when Mike Huckabee picks up an electric bass . . *squeal*. Really, she’s more surprised than you. She’s from New York, you see.

. . I fantasize about tripping tourists who insist on walking three-wide, arm in arm, at a glacial pace on a narrow sidewalk. I routinely have cereal and paper towels delivered, and I haven’t seen the inside of a washing machine in a decade. I’m also in my late 20s, which, coupled with my hip address, ensures that my taste is well-seasoned, appropriately edgy, and probably better than yours.

As if the glasses weren’t a hint.

I will obsess over anything Ricky Gervais does. I can name at least 10 boutique vodkas. My music interests are sufficiently sophisticated that I can condescend to most other age groups with authority. Finally, I’m also a grad student—at NYU, no less—so I’m supposed to be one of those cosmopolitan academics who have designer eyeglasses, a subscription to Artforum, and a ready collection of aphorisms to quote from the likes of Foucault, Derrida, and Sartre.

The Derrida aphorism bimbo. What a gift. Thanks, Republicans, for this newfangled thingamaperson you’ve invented, the uppity airhead. Thank you for Sarah Palin who lectures us about Paul Revere so that we may edit his careening Wikipedia entry. Thank you for Michele Bachmann brandishing glass-eyed chootspah and reminding us that slave owners worked slave-like to end slaveishness. Thanks, thank you, thanks a jillion.

More of the Cupp magic?

Generational Racism is Old and Tired
S.E. Cupp | Townhall |Sep 23, 2009

Jimmy Carter is 85 years old. Dave Letterman is 62, Nancy Pelosi is 69, Maureen Dowd is 57, and Al Sharpton is 54.

. . We talk about race in blunt and unthreatening terms when race is an issue. And when it isn’t an issue, well, we don’t pretend it is.

Not so with the aging liberal cognoscenti, which, as of late, would be better labeled the “ignoscenti” for some of the baffling oddities they’ve uttered. For them, race is simply everywhere. It is hanging from the trees and falling from the sky. It’s in the air, in the water, it is both viscous and fluid, and permeates every willing orifice of every fertile sponge.

Sponges are a horny sentient lot, I know. Talking is Cheaper than Doing . .

“It’s one of those feel-good things that divide liberals from conservatives. Liberals want to talk. Conservatives want to do.

John McCain’s jaw-dropping afternoon statement Wednesday that he is suspending his campaign to return to Washington and work on fixing the country’s economic crisis sounded like someone drawing a saber, getting ready to charge the enemy, yelling ‘Who’s with me?!’ . . it should have forced Obama to mount up and join McCain.”

Alaska is the New Kansas . .

“But the values there — self-reliance, a respect for the land and its resources, and independence — are ridiculed by liberal outsiders who want to paint them as out-of-touch and backwards, with the kind of ethos embodied by an oinking Ned Beatty or a tire-burning Dale Earnhardt Jr., Sarah Palin refuses . .”

Quote Sarah: “Squeee . .” Quote S.E.: “Left-wing women: Stop impaling Palin. Southern hospitality confuses.

Much of life is confusing, for most of us. What to think of Ann Romney? What about her? Heck, that’s a no-brainer. That’s why S.E. likes her so darn much:

The smartest choice Ann Romney made
There is no shame in marrying up
S.E. Cupp | N.Y. Daily News |Apr 18 2012

As a thirtysomething, city-dwelling, hypereducated, independent-thinking woman, I suppose I should recoil at the idea of one day getting married, quitting my ultracompetitive job and staying home to raise my brood of germ-carrying moochers.

But as I sit in a cramped New York apartment, surrounded by bills, drowning in a sea of deadlines, the conventional life of a stay-at-home mother actually sounds pretty nice.

I’m so amazing. But I’m so, like, amazing isn’t for me. What a surprise.

. . while liberal women may praise Ann for (at least) getting herself an education, where is the praise for Ann’s best decision of all — to marry well? . .

If Democrats insist that women need Obama to take care of them, then why shouldn’t women also feel compelled to consider how their future husbands will take care of them? What’s the difference between the feminists’ political marriage to Obama and Ann’s marriage to Mitt? Both choices are predicated on who will be the better provider.

Let’s just admit that politics, money and love are all the same. S. E. sounds like your typical lazy urban intellectual catwoman. Bring it home Zsa Zsa:

The feminists may wish otherwise, but little girls want stability and security, not state-sponsored welfare. For choosing a life partner who could give her that, Ann Romney is a great role model.

This is S.E.’s big point. It seems to be the point of her whole career. The apotheosis of the post-modern woman’s hopes and dreams would be a little girl.


Open your mouth. Right, fine, now breathe.

Gen. George Patton, on the gender war:

Will Maher Go the Way of Olbermann?
By Victor Davis Hanson | March 17, 2012 6:11 P.M.

David Axelrod’s moral-equivalence argument that Limbaugh’s smear is worse than Maher’s because the former is both more influential and more identifiable with Republican circles is a sad sort of sophistry. Limbaugh may have a larger audience, but I suspect if you googled “Rush Limbaugh” and compared it to “Bill Maher,” the so-called hits would be about the same . .




Sarah Palin heart Andrew Breitbart

Look! Miss Tiara Borealis with the Klondike Parkaboobs wants to pay tribute to her bestest new friend, Andrew Breitbart. It is very great and sincere. It is touching.

Yes, Sarah? What is it? You’d like to pee his name in the snow?

by Sarah Palin | Breitbart.com

There is a new street art poster that’s being emailed around and will no doubt eventually be spotted on a street corner near you. It’s a gritty black and white image of Andrew Breitbart looking both battle-worn and ever vigilant with the caption: “BREITBART IS HERE.”

Those three words express the instant connection many of us feel for our fallen friend. They express our identification with him, and our need to continue his fight for the good of our republic.

Terrific. Breitbart’s own graphics lackeys from Breitbart’s own free-market beehive ripped a street poster right from their iMacs. You can see it beneath the high tension wires in your e-mails. In between flaying the homeless for black market kidneys, feel free to pass it along to everybody in your heroin den. WAR, Megyn.

Breitbart’s most immediate mission was the belated vetting of Barack Obama. This obviously is an issue very near and dear to my heart.

That is funny. You’re a nobody from nowhere who ricocheted between 5 colleges before getting a degree in “Who The Fuck Cares?” As Mayor of Wasilla, you bankrupted your town. As Alaska Governor, a state with fewer people than San Jose, California, you were cited for ethics violations and then quit. America believes your choice as the GOP’s 2008 nominee for Vice President was an epic and terrifying blunder.

And what’s this that’s so important to you? Vetting our president? Everybody knows you’re an imbecile. You have neither the talent nor the credibility, Governor.

Oh, and here: